Rain

Moms called early this morning and left a message. Moms invited me for lunch and asked if I would pick up some hot dog buns at the store. Rain was coming down fairly heavy just prior to my departure at 9am. I stopped by Safeway® in Kuapa Kai to purchase the hot dog buns and a cup of coffee. Then, I withdrew $40 from the auto-teller at my local bank. Next stop was the Satellite City Hall. I purchased a bus pass for December. I looked for the new bus schedules, but none were available. The only reason that I had obtained copies of the new bus schedules was because the driver of the bus that I usually ride at night to Kahala Mall was thoughtful enough to to distribute them. I finally reached my destination at 10am. Moms was home awaiting my arrival. Shortly afterward, the rain stopped.

I spent most of the time chatting with moms. Moms had gone to the eye doctor yesterday and discovered that her actual appointment was today. However, blood was discovered behind moms' right eye. So, moms has an appointment tomorrow with her regular physician. Once again, moms showed me where all of her important paperwork was located in case anything happens. Given this new development, I began to wonder if moms subconsciously knows something more about her health.

Moms made hot dogs for my lunch and also made a bowl of saimin for herself. After lunch, coffee ice cream as served up for dessert.I chatted with moms until 12:15pm. I drove back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing) and parked my truck on the side street. I was able to board a bus heading to town within a few minutes. I spent about 45 minutes in the inner courtyard of the library. I became more and more concerned about moms. What could be the cause of the bleeding? Is the problem with moms' eye, or is there a hematoma? I reflected on the fact that moms has been diligently putting her affairs in order. Just the other week, moms made a special trip to the Hosoi Mortuary to review her funeral plan. Moms also briefly went over the plan with me.

I walked to the gym at 2:15pm. I did my usual workout, but my mind was preoccupied. I had often thought that I was prepared for the day that both my parents would be gone. However, I am not as prepared as I thought. I also wondered whether I subconsciously detected something as well. Why else would I be so adamant about spending more time with moms, even if it means that I will deplete my life savings? I rode the bus back to Slob Manor. I piddled around for a while, although my heart was not much into piddling. I also performed the dreaded laundry chores.

Naturally, I had to make a run for my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. First, I walked around Kahala Mall. There was a variety of live entertainment tonight on the center stage. My enjoyment of the latter entertainment was ruined by the myriad of unruly kids running amuck with no apparent supervision. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty at the bookstore. Baby was wearing a dress, and she was looking extremely hot. Eventually, I had to return to Slob Manor. Oh, the horror!

Within a few minutes, a downpour ensued. I had contemplated staying at the mall a little longer. Thank goodness that I didn't. Of course, what have I got to do at Slob Manor? Watch the ants and roaches crawling around? Sheesh!

Ol' Lavahead Day 2007

This year, Ol' Lavahead Day marks a turning point, and not a good one. Another year has gone by, and the ol' lavahead's time on the planet has been reduced by the same quantity. Instead of making progress toward the exodus, he has foolishly turned the tables on himself. He is caught in a crushing financial trap that will eventually bleed him dry. He is still tempted by hotties that he cannot have. And, he is thwarted at every turn to free himself of the madness. What is he to do?

That was not how it was meant to be. On the contrary, a happy ending with the ol' lavahead living the consummate life of the contrarian hero was the order of the day of the past. Whether the ol' lavahead chose either path in the forked road was inconsequential. He could have become a satanic gargoyle, living in the lap of luxury with a young hottie, big bank, big house, and big Vienna Sausage. Or, he could have easily faded into the woodwork as an obscure monk with a near-zero ecological footprint and an invisible persona. As long as "freedom" was the common denominator, the ol' lavahead could claim success. However, at 53 years of age, the ol' lavahead has slipped into a purgatory of enslavement to multiple masters, with each day chipping away at what little "freedom" he has. How could it have come to this?

How could everything have gone so terribly wrong for one solitary individual? And, why was he meant to suffer? A long time ago, a young and naïve lavahead became entrenched in worldly ways. He lived a treacherous and meaningless life, always in pursuit of pleasure and vanity. He was blessed back then by a gluttonous life of plenty. Even hotties made themselves available to him. In his later years, he realized why he was always able to avoid disaster. Inadvertently, he was serving his master, the sinister kahuna (aka El Diablo). By default, he was a disciple of the sinister one. At the exact point in time of the latter revelation, the ol' lavahead took heed to the admonition offered in the Good Book: "If your hand betrays you, cut it off. If your eye betrays you, pull it out." Cutting himself off from the world, in essence from the temple of the sinister kahuna, would exact a heavy price. At 53 years of age, the ol' lavahead maintains his singular wit in opposition to the forces of evil and the Dark Side. In the physical world, the battle pits the ol' lavahead against all satanic gargoyles, the earthly disciples of the sinister one. The battle began many moons ago, but the war wages on. To eternity, the war must continue. The ol' lavahead will never return to the life of debauchery. He will never partake of the poisonous elixir in the chalice of darkness. Will the ol' lavahead continue to suffer at the hands of his arch nemesis? Will he continue the struggle in the name of the exodus? Will he stay true to the bitter end?

I departed for Hawai'i Kai at 10am this morning. My first stop was Safeway® in Kuapa Kai to obtain my required morning cup of coffee. At 10:20am, I drove to the Hawai'i Kai Towne Center. I parked my truck and sat outside Costco® with my cup of coffee. Lori was a few minutes late. When she arrived, she looked curiously around the periphery of the oversized cranium. "I'm looking for signs of age," she said, laughing. I brought the pair of new glasses that I never worn. The lenses are held in place by what appears to be nylon line, of which one had snapped. Lori suggested that we see if the Costco® optical department could do the repair. Sure enough, the optician was able to repair it and for no charge. I was extremely overjoyed.

I rode with Lori in her car back to Kuapa Kai. We ate lunch at The Shack. I had a greasy Island Burger with Freedom French Fries. Lori had a bowl of chili and rice. Lori also persuaded me to drop back a couple of excellent brewskis. We chatted until 1:30pm. Lori gave me a ride back to my truck. I drove back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing) and parked my truck on the side street. I caught a ride part way to town with Lori. We were able to chat for a little longer. Lori's destination was the Ward Center. I thanked her lunch and was on my way to town on the bus.

Once in town, I headed straight for the gym. I did my usual workout. Then, I rode the bus back to Slob Manor. After piddling around for a while, I was on my way to Kahala Mall on the bus at 7pm. I walked around the mall aimlessly, as most senior citizens are accustomed to doing. I finally purchased a smoothie at Jamba Juice®. Then, I made my way to my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. No Asian hottie "bookseller" tonight. Boohoo. What a horrible way to end Ol' Lavahead Day!

Even worse, I had to return to my squalid room in Slob Manor, a place where the ol' lavahead is being wrongfully ostracized as a "snitch" for the landlord. Oh Lord, can it get any dumber than that? Alas, Ol' Lavahead Day has come gone. A few more sands have fallen in the hourglass of mortality. "Oh, the vanity," the ol' lavahead gasped, just as King Solomon did when he uttered the very same words in Hebrew many hundreds of moons ago.

Out and About

I was awakened by what sounded like thunder and lighting this morning. Sure enough, there was a major downpour. Moms had called and left a message that she wanted to meet me Ala Moana Center. I had to persuade moms that it was best to postpone the trip because of the weather. I drove out to Hawai'i Kai at 9pm. The weather began to clear up. Moms and I drove to Longs® in Kuapa Kai instead. I purchased a cup of coffee at the Safeway® across the way while moms was shopping. We also stopped by Foodland in Koko Marina so that moms could do some grocery shopping. We picked up spaghetti plate lunches from Zippy's. After lunch, moms served up coffee ice cream. I was able to chat with moms for a while. Lately, the discussions have been less trivial, most of it dealing with family issues.

I walked down to the gym in Koko Marina at 1pm. After a nice workout, I walked back to say good-bye to moms. I ended up chatting with moms for another 20 minutes. I also called Lori because I did not reply to her e-mail of a few days ago. We agreed to meet at Kahala Mall later in the afternoon. I stopped off at the Payless® shoe store at the Hawai'i Kai Towne Center on my out of Hawai'i Kai. I am looking for a cheap pair of canvas shoes. Then, I drove back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing) to drop off the goodies that moms had given me.

I drove to Kahala Mall and parked my truck. I made my way to Barnes & Noble®. Lori arrived a few minutes later. We sat in the café. Lori sipped tea, and I had a cup of decaffeinated coffee to keep me occupied. We chatted until about 6pm. There was a lot of news to catch up with. Lori wants to go surfng again. Heck, Slob Manor is right across the street from a decent surf spot. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty, by the way. Baby was looking hot. Lori gave me a ride back to the vicinity of Slob Manor so we could continue chatting. I left my truck at Kahala Mall.

Once back in Slob Manor, I piddled around for a few minutes. Then, I was off to Kahala Mall on the bus. Upon alighting the bus, I walked directly to my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. Sadly, the Asian hottie "bookseller" was already gone. I spent an hour there before driving my truck back to Slob Manor.

Can I call Slob Manor my home? Baha! Ha! Haaa! What a laugh! Although, I must admit that it has a few home-like touches like scores of roaches and ants thanks to all the garbage strewn about. I have been sleeping in my new $14 sleeping bag. To be perfectly honest, I have not sleep better in a long time. I must still use ear plugs, however. What more can I say about the dump?

Invisible Hand (Reprise)

Another homeless guy kind-of-a-day found me in town at 10:40am. The bus was 20 minutes late this morning. I had to bake in the hot sun for those long 20 minutes. The old local homeless guy was sitting on the dividing wall in Kamali'i Park when I walked through on my way to Safeway®. He was joined by a couple of familiar halfway house derelicts. On my back through Kamali'i Park, the old local homeless guy asked me, "Poppa, can you sell me one cigarette?" Just a few minutes prior, a young haole guy asked me for money. He claimed that he just got out of jail and needed bus fare. He was probably a new halfway house derelict.

Even though the day was overcast, the ambient temperature was above my comfort zone. The high humidity is the culprit. I changed from my t-shirt to a tank top once I arrived at the library. I almost tore the t-shirt because it had adhered to my perspiration-soaked skin. Fortunately, I carry everything in my little gym bag. That's a practical lesson that I learned from the homeless.

The inner courtyard of the library remains as sole daytime sanctuary. Peace, quiet, and solitude is what I need. I am convinced that I am precariously close to the edge of sanity. That is why I seek out any refuges with a calming ambiance. That is also why I have not made a concerted effort to return to wage slavery. In my fragile mental state, I must avoid any confrontational and demeaning environment.

I am, however, whittling away at my savings at an increasingly accelerated pace. Frankly, I have lost the will to be concerned. Uncle Tosh's situation has jogged my memory of my original plan to retire broke. Because of health issues, most of us will end up broke in our so-called "golden years." That's the "system" at work. The only possible way to avoid financial trauma is to purchase all kinds of insurance plans. Yet, there's no guarantee that the insurance carrier will still be around or whether the policies will cover the ever-increasing costs. With my paltry savings, I would most likely be broke by 70 years of age anyway due to projected medical expenses since Medicare will not provide any coverage until all financial resources are depleted. By the way, Medicare, like Social Security are unfunded obligations. In other words, there is no money specifically placed in trust. It's all "pay 'n go." One would need at least $3 million in liquid assets to retire without concern. For me, that's a lost cause.

Incidentally, there's another hottie working at the library. Baby looks a little bookworm-ish, but under that subterfuge lies a real hottie. I spent a couple of hours at the library, the last of which I lapsed in and out of a coma. Gym time was at 2:30pm. I did my usual workout. Then, I endured another hour-plus bus ride back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing).

I ended up at Kahala Mall again tonight. No surprise, eh? I purchased a loaf of bread at Longs®. Then, I had to seek refuge in my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty. Baby was looking hot, but we already knew that. I was back in Slob Manor by 9:10pm. Same ol' shit.

Well, I can fully understand how the Fed and the government bullhorns are able to lie through their teeth and get away with it. An example is the totally bogus low inflation statistics. The average satanic gargoyle possesses elementary school arithmetic skills. It's so bad that I cannot use the term, "mathematical skills." Even worse is the understanding of basic statistics, probability, and economics. With so much ignorance and stupidity amongst the general populace, it's easy to see why few refute the two percent "core" inflation measure. The real weakness is evident in critical thinking skills which would compel the bearer to question the validity of the criteria to determine the bogus statistics for inflation, unemployment, growth of the economy, and so forth. Then again, if the general populace had possessed even rudimentary critical thinking skills, we probably would not be engaged in the quagmires of Iraq and Afghanistan today.

Higher order mathematical skills are crucial in developing logical thought processes, conceptual blockbusting, and critical thinking. Reading comprehension is also a factor. It is my belief that, short of having $3 million in liquid assets, perfecting the aforementioned skills will be the sole determinant of who survives the upcoming fray of the secular Apocalypse.

The secular Apocalypse is coming, my friends. We have already reached Peak Oil. And, as energy sources deplete, the idiots want to convert to "biofuels." Thus, we must divert food crops to the production of fuel to propel the ubiquitous 4000-pound motorized chair (read: automobile). I, for one, cannot understand the logic of placing the 4000-pound motorized chair at the center of importance. Starving is a better option than walking? Peak Oil will affect agriculture, since modern agriculture can only be sustained by artificial means.

We are, in essence, barreling straight for the cliff. Without cheap energy, the planet can only sustain a population of 2.5 billion maximum. I suppose that the elite class has it all figured out. After we destroy the whole of human civilization (term used loosely), they will somehow rise out of the ashes and rebuild their perfect elite society. Frankly, I have no faith in humanity. We cannot save ourselves. Not even the elite class with all their worthless paper money can save themselves. Our future is in the hand of the Almighty.

When Economic Worlds Collide

I was at Kahala Mall by 9am this morning. I did a little shopping at Longs® first. Then, I purchased a small cup of coffee at the Barnes & Noble® Café. I perused a few magazines for about an hour. I met moms at 10:30am. Instead of eating lunch at the mall, moms and I drove back to Hawai'i Kai. Moms prepared leftover turkey for lunch. Coffee ice cream was served up for dessert. I was able to chat with moms for a while. Moms mentioned that Uncle Tosh will be going back home from the hospital in a few days. However, Aunty Maria will not be able to provide the kind of critical care that he needs. Medicare will not pay for a stay in a convalescent home unless Uncle Tosh and Aunty Maria are flat broke. In other words, they will have to deplete whatever retirement nest egg that they have and possibly sell off their condo first. I am not sure how that is going to play out.

I also weighed myself on moms' scale. Yikes! I have lost about 12 pounds in the last year or so. I am becoming emaciated. Sheesh! I am down to 142 pounds, which is what I weighed back about 20 years ago when I was in the best shape in my life. However, that means my body fat is way low, probably too low. No wonder I cannot get any respect at the gym. I am a skinny wimp faggot.

After saying good-bye to moms, I was off to town. i first parked my truck on the side street next to Slob Manor (read: rental housing). Then, I baked in the hot sun until the bus arrived. I was in town before 2:30pm. I did my usual workout. Another long bus ride brought me back to Slob Manor.

The Indian guy, whom I share the upstairs portion of the house, has filled the whole refrigerator full of crap in the past two days. I only have room for a loaf of bread and a carton of milk. The moron is obviously playing childish games with me. He and the other housemates want to force me out because they suspect that I am the "snitch" who is passing information to the landlord. They can play all the games they want, as long as they do not tamper with my belongings. That's when the games will end very quickly.

I realize that when I was a college-aged fool, I was involved in the "soap opera" and drama of my small little world, the one that I thought revolved around me. The vanity and stupidity, in retrospect, was detestable. Had I been more mature, I would not be in the predicament that I am in today. These young fools, on the other hand, are destined to become true losers. They are too arrogant to see their own faults. I should feel pity for them, but I don't. They are living in their small worlds where only they are important. They are the stars of their own "reality" shows, and celebrities only in their own minds.

I was on my way to Kahala Mall at 7pm. My first stop was Longs® again. I purchased a couple of packages of Diamond Bakery® cookies. Moms used to give those to me for snacks a long time ago. I also purchased another pack of M&M's® candy. Then, I walked around the mall. The candy brought joy to my heart. I ended up at my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®, to top off the evening. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty. Baby was wearing a short black dress. Oh baby! My mind almost snapped. The thought of returning to Slob Manor sobered me up pretty quick. I will spend the rest of the evening in my squalid little room. Yep, same ol' shit.

All bets are on the Fed lowering short-term interest rates by at least 0.5 percent. I am revising my own expectation to one full percentage point. We are currently in a recession,one that is being refuted with doctored-up statistics. The goal of the Fed is to pump up the stock market because it is the one and only, tried and true "bubble" that keeps on giving. With the collapse of the so-called "real estate bubble," there is little choice. Pensions, mutual funds, 401(k)s,and the like are heavily invested in "casino finance," the stock market being the mainstay. The liquidity" (i.e., money) is being created electronically. It did not exist until it was created out of thin air. There is no value behind it because it just appeared from nowhere. It was not the result of anything produced. Thus, it will devalue the dollar further and create inflation. Costs of goods and services rise and we see real inflation.

On the other hand, the collapse of the housing market is seeing drastic decreases in home prices. For upper middle class folk, the home is 30 percent of their net worth. For the rank-and-file peon, the house (if the peon "owns" one) may be the entire net worth. Home prices fall and net worth decreases. We call the latter deflation. As Bill Bonner of the Daily Reckoning sees it, we are heading for a collision between inflation and deflation. Then, when the Fed lowers interest rates below two percent, the B-2 stealth bombers will be winging their way to Iran.

Emaciation

Another homeless guy emulation kind-of-a-day with the exception that the library was not open. Gym time was at 12:30pm. The hottie gym trainer was working with a gym member. Baby was looking so fine. I ran into Austin, another former Diploma Mill student. We chatted for a few minutes. I did my usual workout. To my surprise, I noted that I am becoming emaciated. Well, not exactly emaciated. I am becoming leaner as I lose more body fat. Even more surprising is that my general physique is almost identical to what it was ten years ago when I was at the apex of my gym tenure. I reflected on my commitment to physical training. I have maintained a regular exercise regimen for over 27 years straight. Now, if only the hottie gym trainer would come around. Sheesh! I was on my way back to Slob Manor on the bus at 2:45pm.

Once back in the filthy dump, I piddled around in my squalid room for the remainder of the afternoon. I ate beans and bread for dinner. Then, at 7pm, I was of to Kahala Mall. I stopped by Longs® yet again. I purchased a loaf of King's Hawai'ian® sweet bread to stave off my emaciation. Naturally, the bread is no longer made in Hawai'i. It's made in Cali. I ended up at my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®, as to be expected. I did not stay very long, returning to Slob Manor at 8:35pm. The rest of the evening? Same ol' shit.

I am now a little more concerned about the new bus routes and how they will affect moms as well the myriad other senior citizens who live in the Hawai'i Kai area. A simple trip to Kahala Mall will require a transfer to second bus. The wait for the "circulator" bus could be as long as 20 minutes. The idea has been implemented at the regional transit hubs in Waipahu and Kapolei. Needless to say, I did not particularly care for the "circulator" routing.

Another concern has come to the forefront. I am wondering how long before moms will not be able to step up into the cab of my Nissan® Frontier truck. Obviously, this was extremely poor planning on my part. If moms becomes less ambulatory, I may have to rid myself of the truck and purchase a small van. The thought came to me because of Uncle Tosh's situation. Since he has been confined to a wheelchair, he has had to ride in a special van with an elevator lift. The $80 fare is prohibitive. Moms turns 86 years old in a few months. I have already seen moms slow down considerably in the past year. It's only going to get worse.

There's just too much on my mind lately. I've been worrying about moms, about my financial situation, the idiotic "condotel" unit, amongst other minor concerns. I, too, am growing older. I am running out of time. On second thought, maybe I am becoming emaciated.

Halfway to Nowhere

I neglected to mention that Caroll and my homey, Rod, both called and left messages on Thanksgiving Day. Unfortunately,my cell phone has absolutely no call time minutes available, so I have not been able to return the calls.

Another day of the infamous homeless guy emulation. Let's just say that it was exactly the same as yesterday. I ran into Richard, a former Diploma Mill student, at the library. We had an interesting chat. The gym was ... well, the gym. During the ride back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing) on the bus, I discovered that several major changes are to take place along the current Route 1 service area. The new daytime route will have additional "circulator" routes (i.e, Routes 231, 232, 233) which will require transferring between buses. Even the Route 58 will be changed to the new Route 23. With little else to do, I decided to perform the dreaded laundry chores while I continued to review the propaganda material about the new bus routes.

I ended up at Kahala Mall again this evening. I made the rounds and ended up at my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. The mall was extremely crowded this evening. The Saturnalia shopping season is in full swing. Everyone was buying crap like there's going to be no tomorrow. I felt completely disconnected. Everyone seemed so happy. I began to have my doubts about whether the financial crisis really exists. Money was flowing like water all around me. I was the only poverty-stricken individual in the whole mall. Nonetheless, I enjoyed my time in my safe haven. Alas, eventually, I had to return to Slob Manor. The rest of the evening? Same ol' shit. I had to transfer $700 to my local bank in order to pay next month's rent at Slob Manor. My money market funds are rapidly depleting. Lord, have mercy!

Revolution

The sandwich was dry and bland. The pudding cake tasted like cellophane and had the consistency of cardboard. Only the Foster's® brewski was okay. So much for my Thanksgiving Day feast. I spent all night with my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer since I had nothing else to do. Ho boy! Thus, I was eager to leave Slob Manor (read: rental housing) this morning. I departed 30 minutes earlier than usual.

I followed the usual itinerary of homeless guy emulation ... brunch courtesy Safeway®, sitting in the catacombs of Kukui Plaza, and ending up in the inner courtyard of the library. I did absolutely nothing for over two hours. Just as I was about ready to leave, I looked up and saw John from Heald College. We chatted for a few minutes. I was able to glean from him that his wife is from the Philippines. They met through some kind of Net "pen pal" site.Then, we parted company. I walked to the gym. I did my usual workout. Another fatiguing bus ride brought me back to Slob Manor.

The Indian guy was the only one home when I entered the filthy dungeon of Slob Manor. He was watching the UH football game. I piddled around for a bit before departing for Kahala Mall. I ate dinner at Taco Bell®. Yep, two Cheesy Bean and Rice Burritos. Oh man, those were the best Taco Bell® burritos that I have ever tasted. I then went shopping at Longs®. I purchased a couple of sundries and a small package of M&M's® candy. What a treat! I was really enjoying my night on the mall. Then, I realized that the place was almost empty. Everyone was at the football game. No wonder I was having a good time. I had to make an obligatory visit to my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. No Asian hottie "bookseller." Baby was probably at the game as well. I returned to Slob Manor at 9pm. The rest of the evening will be the same old shit in my squalid room.

Incidentally, my housemates at Slob Manor are now shunning me. Frankly, I don't care. From what I am to understand, they believe that I am snitching on them to the landlord. It's obvious that I am dealing with a bunch of sophomoric twenty-somethings. They have no idea that I have no time for juvenile crap. At this point in time, my life is extremely chaotic. I could care less about the trivia and drama that make up their shallow lives. They are young and stupid. I am a seasoned old codger who is on his way out. As long as the fools leave me and my stuff alone, everything will be just fine. Really?

Everything is so out of control now that only a revolution could bring about change. What kind of revolution? Anything ... a prolonged general consumer strike as I have suggested, a violent uprising (read: insurgency), or a complete "wildcard" Presidential candidate who ends up in office. In fact, I am really sick and tired of the election crap, from the cheesy advertising to the contrived debates. Frankly, let me tell you right now that William Blum should be written in as the Presidential candidate of choice. Blum, by the way, is the author of "Rogue State: A Guide to the World's Only Superpower." We need a fresh candidate, not another career politician. And, we certainly do not need another corporate bullhorn. I'm sorry, but neither Dennis Kucinich or Ron Paul can provide the answer. William Blum is da man!

Thanksgiving Day 2007

Every year, I usually offer a few words of gratitude for my paltry existence. Yet, with each passing year, I have less and less to be thankful for. Aside from living a fairly healthy and mendicant life-style, I can safely say that everything else is slowly being robbed from me. That includes the gamut from my paltry savings to my sanity. I am living in a nation of fools, satanic gargoyles to be specific, who are hellbent on self-destruction. I have not seen general conditions degenerate as rapidly as has occurred between the year 2000 and now. As with all degenerate societies, the rot starts from within.

I find that I can no longer tolerate the culture of greed, self-centeredness, hedonism, and consumerism. The whole of society can be likened to a termite-eaten stump of wood. And, as we continue to live in morbid luxury, consuming (read: wasting) the world's resources, there are billions of people living in squalor. In addition, the empire's quest for (fill in the blank) has now caused two nations to be completely ravaged by senseless war. And, no one gives a shit! Should I be thankful for that?

Well, I can be grateful that I wasn't born a rich asshole, full of conceit and filled with a lust for power. I am thankful that I wasn't born a stud, able to charm any babe to do da wild thing. I am thankful that I have Shrub and Ben Bernanke, both working for my demise. I am thankful to be the ol' lavahead, the loser's loser, the guy who can only wish to be a third-class citizen. I have lost most of my so-called "friends," leaving me with assorted scum and parasites to deal with. I do have my virtual homeys, thank goodness. I am continuing to downsize my existence, readying myself for the exodus. I have become an invisible monk. And, I am still the Keeper. I am the Keeper of Lost Lives, one being my own.

Well, this was the first year that I was not invited somewhere for Thanksgiving Day dinner. My feelings were not hurt, by the way. Rather, I must clearly be on the right path for the exodus. In any case, I was left to my own devices for the day. I departed for town on the bus at 10am. I took a roundabout route through Waikiki, Ala Moana, and finally to town simply because I hopped on the first bus that came by. I had already been standing in the hot sun for town minutes. After alighting the bus, I walked through Kamali'i Park. The old local homeless guy was arranging three pairs of his shoes on the dividing wall to dry them out. I continued on to Safeway® to purchase my brunch. Did I give in to my coffee addiction? You bet! The whole place was filled with satanic gargoyles running amuck, no doubt shopping for last minute items for their Thanksgiving Day feast. Will they take time to remember the Iraqis and Afghans that we, as a nation, have either "homicided" or displaced? I seriously doubt it. Most likely everyone will be stuffing their faces to excess, drinking cheap booze to the point of obnoxiousness, and engaging in generally boorish behavior. Well, hey! That's the "American way"!

I sat in the catacombs of Kukui Plaza and enjoyed my brunch. The day was quite beautiful with clear blue skies, although the air was cooler than usual. I decided that I should walk around and enjoy the sunshine. I sat outside on a bench along the Makai (read: lower) end of Fort Street Mall near Bank of Hawai'i. One of the old time homeless guy sat on a bench behind me. The idiotic security guard positioned himself about 25 feet in front of me in a less than discretionary manner. When I got up to cross the street to go to the gym, the idiotic security guard also dispersed. What a maroon! Little did the fool realize that the Bank of Hawai'i holds my mortgage. I am far from being homeless at this point in time.

I did my usual workout st the gym. I am thankful that the gym was open today until 4pm. I was able to board a bus immediately upon my departure from the gym. I arrived back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing) at 3:30pm. I had thought of simply having a can of beans with bread for dinner, nothing unusual for me even on Thanksgiving Day. With so much time on my hands, I decided to ride the bus to Koko Marina. I had enough time to look around Foodland until the next bus arrived. I purchased a crummy sandwich, a piece of pudding cake, and a big-ass can of Foster's® brewski. Oh, what a Thanksgiving Day one-man feast I am going to have! Throw in some House Music courtesy DI.FM, and I'm good to go! Well, that's the Ol' Lavahead's Thanksgiving Day Special. The rest of the day? Same ol' shit, of course!

Dispatches from the Mundane

I barely slept last night, thank to the cup of coffee that I drank. This morning, I was extremely groggy. No surprise. I drove to Hawai'i Kai at 9:30am. I did not bother purchasing any coffee. Frankly, I need to make a decision about my coffee consumption. Is my morning cup of coffee increasing my pleasure? Or, is it a liability, financially and healthwise? Moms was home when I arrived. Moms did not feel too well yesterday. Moms experienced what she calls "dizzy head" all day yesterday. Regular readers may recall that moms experiences "dizzy head" every now and then. Moms was feeling better today.

I walked down the library in Hawai'i Kai to donate three of my books including "Crossing the Rubicon" by Mike Ruppert, "American Theocracy" by Kevin Phillips, and "Empire of Debt" by William Bonner and Addison Wiggin. Yes, I have commenced the divestiture of my prized library. Why? Well, I have become very nauseous of politics and current affairs for one thing. However, I want to "share the wealth" by putting the books into library's general circulation.

Later, I gave moms a ride to Koko Marina. Moms did some shopping at Foodland. We also stopped by Kozo Sushi and Loco Moco for our lunch stuff. After lunch, moms served up some coffee ice cream. I visited with moms until 12:30pm. Then, I returned to Slob Manor (read: rental housing). Upon parking my truck, I was on my way to town on the bus. Working out at the gym was the sole item on my agenda. I ran into Pseudo-professor Lee just as I entered the gym. He mentioned that the fat Fem-Nazi bitch is no longer the Math Department chairperson. Ain't that something? The fat bitch was around the Diploma Mill just long enough to cause a lot of damage. Then, the bitch is gone. I did my usual gym workout. I exited the gym at 3:45pm. Between waiting for the bus and making a transfer to a connecting bus, I did not arrive back in Slob Manor until 5:15pm.

I piddled around, although I was ready to fall asleep. A downpour commenced at 6:30pm, which almost thwarted my nightly excursion to Kahala Mall. The rain stopped at 7pm. I rode the bus to Kahala Mall at 7:30pm, a little later than usual. I went directly to my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty. Baby was looking mighty fine. I spent less than an hour there before returning to Slob Manor. For some reason, I am compelled to continue my nightly excursions.

There is no question that the US financial system is collapsing, yet there's hardly a word mentioned in the so-called "mainstream media."The soothsayers in the financial markets are predicting the Fed to cut short-term interest rates by 0.75 percent. Judging from the Fed's continuing capitulation to speculators, I'd say that anything between 0.5 percent to 1 full percentage point is possible. Remember, when we cross the 2.0 percent threshold by mid-2008, we will commence the incursion into Iran.

Inner Demons

Another homeless guy emulation kind-of-a-day. Safeway® was completely out of coffee, so I had to go through a minor caffeine withdrawal. By noon, I was completely fatigued. Fortunately, I had made my way to the inner courtyard of the library before then. So, I was able to lapse in and out of a coma in tranquil surroundings.

I restored my monk haircut at the Institute of Hair Design. Then, I did my usual workout at the gym. After another hour long bus ride, I was back in Slob Manor (read: rental housing). I was even more fatigued than earlier in the day. I piddled around for a while, barely able to remain conscious. I had no other choice but to hit the road again, as it were.

I ended up at Kahala Mall. No surprise, eh? I was even ore irritable. In fact, I had to open Lou's School of Etiquette for matriculation. Sadly, I realized that the problem was definitely caffeine withdrawal. I purchased a cup of coffee at the Barnes & Noble® Café. About halfway through the cup of coffee, I began to feel "normal." Aside from eating away at my limited budget, my coffee habit has gotten me addicted to caffeine again. When mood is affected by a substance, then the use of that substance must be discontinued. I really enjoy my daily fix of coffee. What am I going to do?

I walked around the bookstore until the appointed time to leave. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty. Baby was looking hot! One of my former young hottie Chaminade students, Elizabeth, also works there. She was on duty as well. I was back at Slob Manor by 9pm. What will I do for the rest of the evening? I may view "Star Trek: Nemesis" again. Sheesh!

Twilight Zone

I met moms at Kahala Mall for lunch. I arrived much earlier to enjoy a cup of coffee at the Barnes & Noble® Café. Moms also arrives earlier to shop at Longs®. Moms and I ate lunch at Pearl's Korean Barbeque. After lunch, I gave moms a ride back to Hawai'i Kai. Moms served up coffee ice cream for dessert. Moms and I were able to chat briefly. I drove back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing) and parked my truck. I then rode the bus to town. My only purpose in town is, of course, to go to the gym. I did my usual workout. Then, I rode the bus back to Slob Manor.

Within minutes of my arrival at Slob Manor, a heavy downpour commenced. Undeterred, I departed for Kahala Mall at 7pm with my umbrella. Fortunately, the bus arrived right on time. When I arrived in Kahala Mall, the rain had downgraded to a drizzle. I dropped off a bag in the Goodwill dropbox that moms had forgotten to bring with her this morning. Then, I meandered around the mall, ending up at my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®, of course. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty. Baby was looking mighty fine. I spent just 30 minutes at the bookstore.

I rode the bus to the Aina Haina Shopping Center. The rain was still coming down hard in Aina Haina. Fortunately, there is a covered walkway from the bus stop to Foodland. I had to purchase a carton of milk ($3.50 for a half-gallon carton, on sale), a couple of bananas, and two frozen burritos that would suffice as my dinner. I walked out to the bus stop with the rain still coming down hard. A few minutes before the bus arrived, the rain fizzled out. When I alighted the bus, I was able to walk back to Slob Manor without getting drenched. The rest of the evening will be the same ol' shit.

The "blog" has stepped back into the mundane as I have reverted to the tried and true formula of chronicling the redundant itinerary of the ol' lavahead. What happened to all of the cutting edge analysis of world affairs? I have grown very weary of the world as we know it. I am twiddling my thumbs as I am being robbed blind by the moneychangers and the powers-that-be, just as you are. I am witnessing a war being waged in two nations that have done nothing to us. No one can stop the wars. I am looking at all of the stuff made in China and wondering what exactly do we produce anymore. I am observing the upcoming farce of an election where we will be presented with more "dittohead" candidates who will only continue the status quo. And, the punchline? The general public could care less. I might as well be in the "Twilight Zone."

No Title Required

Last night, I watched "Star Trek: Nemesis" on my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer. All I can say is, "Wow!" My notebook computer has a 17-inch widescreen display, so I was able to enjoy a theater-like experience. I was able to crank up the volume of the soundtrack thanks to my Phillips® earbud headphones. I had never seen the movie when it was first released. Most likely being the last of the "Star Trek: TNG" series, I had to see it. And, what a finale!

Another homeless guy emulation kind-0f-a-day. When I alighted the bus in town, I saw the old local homeless guy hobbling along with his cane down Beretania Street from Kamali'i Park. His shopping cart with his worldly possessions was parked against the dividing wall. As usual, I shopped at Safeway® and sat in the catacombs of Kukui Plaza. Brunch consisted of coffee and air-filled energy bars.

I walked to the gym fairly early. I only caught a glimpse of the hottie gym trainer when I descended the stairway into the weight room. Baby disappeared after that. I was able to board a bus immediately after I left the gym. Thus, I arrived back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing) before 3pm. With little else to do, I performed the dreaded laundry chores a few days earlier than expected.

I piddled around for the rest of the afternoon. A brief heavy rain shower soaked the area. Even though the rain stopped, I decided to remain in Slob Manor for the rest of the evening. What will I do? Same ol' shit.

Day in a Nutshell

I woke up at 8:30am this morning feeling extremely groggy. Knowing that I would have to endure another day of the homeless guy itinerary made me nauseous. I discovered that moms had called. Moms expressed some kind of urgency to visit Uncle Tosh this afternoon. For some reason, Uncle Tosh had been admitted to the Straub Clinic's hospital in town. In a second message, moms stated that she would take the bus to town. I tried to call moms, but moms had already left for the morning.

Foolishly, I was about to leave the matter as it was and continue with my homeless guy itinerary. Then, I realized the folly of my error. I immediately changed my plans. I drove to Kahala Mall to enjoy a cup of coffee at the Barnes & Noble® Café, knowing that I had at least until noon to waste some time. I also meandered through the aisles for no apparent reason. I departed at 11:30am, making a stop at Safeway® to purchase a couple of air-filled energy bars. The coffee was making me jittery on an empty stomach. I leaned against the bed of my truck in the parking lot and devoured the energy bars.

I drove via Hawai'i Kai Drive and turned onto Lunalilo Home Road. I saw a bus up ahead that stopped to pick up a passenger. Suddenly, I wondered if moms had returned home early and would be attempting to catch that particular bus. I quickly turned up Kaumakani Street. As I approached the next bus stop, I saw mom standing there. Had I been just a minute later, I would missed moms.

The drive to town was fairly quick. I parked the truck in the Straub parking structure. Within a few minutes, we arrived at Uncle Tosh's room. Aunty Maria was already there. I actually went in to see Uncle Tosh today. According to moms, he looked a lot better. Apparently, Uncle Tosh had developed some kind of infection which was making him very ill. The staff at the Ka Punawai Ola rehabilitation center was not equipped to deal with medical emergencies. Thus, no intervention was prescribed until Uncle Tosh exhibited extreme symptomotology. Aunty Maria had called moms in a distressed state because she felt that Uncle Tosh was not going to make it through yesterday. However, he was fully stabilized when we saw him. He was up and talking for the duration of our visit. Last week, moms said that Uncle Tosh looked very ill and spent most of the time sleeping.

After an hour or so, we left. Moms did not have anything to eat all day since she was in a rush since this morning. So, we stopped off at Kahala Mall and ate a late lunch at Panda Express®. After lunch, we drove back to Hawai'i Kai. I only chatted with moms briefly because I knew that moms was very late for her afternoon nap. I parked my truck in Koko Marina and walked to the gym. I did my usual cardio workout. Then, I returned to Slob Manor (read: rental housing).

By 7pm, I was feeling a little claustrophobic. As fatigued as I was, I managed to ride the bus to Kahala Mall. I walked to Blockbuster®, directly across the street from the mall. The place was packed with idiots. I thought of renting a DVD, but thought better of the $5 rental fee. Naturally, I ended up at my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. I spent most of the time perusing the music and DVD section. To prove that I have lost all fiscal control, I purchased the "Star Trek: Nemesis" DVD. Obviously, I will be watching the flick late tonight on my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer. That's my day in a nutshell. Sheesh!

Mind-Numbing Routine

Another homeless guy emulation kind-0f-a-day. I saw the old local homeless guy sitting on the dividing wall in Kamali'i Park near Beretania Street after I completed my rounds at Safeway®. I followed my usual itinerary through the Capitol district, past the grove of banyan trees, and on to the library. I spent over two hours in the library courtyard, using most of that time to lapse in and out of a coma. I have been extremely fatigued as of late. My nerves are shot. I am irritable. Clearly, I am in a fragile mental state.

I did my usual gym workout. My enthusiasm was somewhat diminished. Then, I rode an extremely crowded bus back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing). Along the way, I observed the traffic, just as I do every morning when I stand at the bus stop. There's no way that anyone is going to give up driving until the last drop of petrol is gone. Even here in Hawai'i, city and regional planning revolves around the 4000-pound motorized chair (read: automobile). I would venture to guess that driving patterns will remain consistent even if petrol were in the $10 to $15 range per gallon.

I have not been able to adjust my life-style to allow myself to vegetate in my squalid little room. Thus, I was on my way at 7pm to Kahala Mall. I wanted to make the trek to Ala Moana, but I was too fatigued. I browsed in Macy's® for no apparent reason. I ended up in the housewares department. My project for the evening? Find a product not made in China. Baha! Ha! Ha! Haaa! That's impossible! I also stopped by Longs®. I've been tempted to purchase a few bottles of wine to get hammered. The temptation is increasing by the day. Naturally, my excursion would not be complete without a visit to my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty. Baby is so gorgeous. I was still feeling sluggish, so I purchased a small cup of coffee in the café, possibly not a very prudent decision given my chronic insomnia. I was back in Slob Manor by 10pm. The rest of the evening? Same ol' shit.

I am only slightly amused by the increasing correlation between the Fed's injection of huge sums of money into the "system" (the largest so far yesterday) and the rebound of the stock market. It is as if the stock market is being kept afloat by the Fed. Well, indirectly that's true. The Fed has also been increasing the money supply to drive interest rates down. Right now, the market itself is pushing interest rates higher. I should be amused, but I'm not. Even less amusing is the rumor that money market funds may present surprise losses to investors. Normally, a money market fund maintains a "safe" $1 share price. Now, because of the so-called "liquidity crisis," the funds may reduce the share price. That could mean huge losses for the ol' lavahead.

At this point in time, I have essentially given up. I will lose all, if not most, of my money when the shit hits the fan. I won't be alone. Millions of other rank-and-file peons will be there with me. We'll be reduced to poverty in a short period of time as the final wealth transfer to the elite class takes effect. It can't be stopped. The shell game has gone on for so long that it's totally out of control. A global recession is inevitable. There's going to be a lot of pain and suffering. Will that spur the secular Apocalypse? Let's hope so.

White Noise

I started the day off with a fresh cup of coffee from the Barnes & Noble® Café in Kahala Mall. I perused a few magazines, however I had little interest in the content. There's just too much hype. The computer magazines are repetitive. The surfing magazines are full of advertising with only about three pages of content. Even The Economist is a bullhorn for the "system." What's left?

I ran into Ann while I was walking around the store. We chatted for about an hour. She is apparently unemployed again. She gave me the details of her last two jobs. I also filled her in about my own precarious situation. I asked her if she had seen my old buddy Mark lately. Ann said that he is now working at the State law library.

After saying good-bye to Ann, I drove to Hawai'i Kai. Moms was home when I arrived. Moms showed me the paperwork for her funeral arrangements. As important as the paperwork was, I really did not want to delve into the matter in detail. That particular situation is something that I will deal with when the time comes. I drove moms to Koko Marina to do some shopping at Foodland. Then, we ordered plate lunches to go from Zippy's. After lunch, moms served up coffee ice cream for dessert. I walked back to Koko Marina and did my workout at the gym. I was too fatigued to deal with the idiocy of rushing to town on the bus. I was about 20 minutes late returning, even though I had cut my workout short. Moms was already awake from her nap. Moms was very worried that something had happened. I assured moms that everything was fine. After saying good-bye to moms, I stopped at Safeway® in Kuapa Kai. I had to stock up on more cans of beans. Sheesh!

I was back in my squalid little room in Slob Manor (read: rental housing) by 4pm. I piddled around until 7pm. I walked to the bus stop. As I stood there, seemingly frozen in time, the traffic from both directions whizzed past me. Within seconds, the traffic blurred into streaks of light. Derealization was deconstructing my immediate reality. The sounds of the traffic blended into white noise. My soul felt one-dimensional. I was not even sure if I was me. When the bus arrived, the surreal backdrop swirled back into three dimensions. I was on my way to Kahala Mall.

When I arrived at the mall, I walked to Times Market to see if I could purchase some sushi. Nada. So, I walked back to the mall and purchased a smoothie for dinner at Jamba Juice®. I sat on a bench outside the Radio Shack® store. I ruminated upon my one-dimensional existence. Why couldn't I have been a hurdy-gurdy star? Then, I could be doin' da wild thing with endless hotties. I became very agitated. So, I made my way to my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty. Baby was looking mighty fine. I perused a few books, looking for something that I can put on my list of future purchases. Then, sadly, I returned to Slob Manor to squander another evening with my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer. Oh, the horror!

Mortality Blues

The old local homeless guy was just waking up as I walked through Kamali'i Park this morning on my way to Safeway®. He was lying on a tattered blanket along the dividing wall. I followed the same itinerary as yesterday. However, I made certain that I did not walk through the gardens of the Capitol district in a comatose state. I carefully observed the majestic banyan tree and the stately palm trees. What a grand sight! To think, all of those trees had modest beginnings with tiny seedlings. How many human lifetime were required for the trees to have grown to their present size? There is just no end to the miracle of the Creation.

The inner courtyard of the library inspired more appreciation from me as I inspected the various plants and trees. For that brief moment in time, I felt an inner peace. All of the satanic anxieties vaporized. Watching the various birds walking about foraging for food was amusing. As they waddle around, their little heads bob back and forth with each step.

Then, it dawned upon me. Where are the animals? Aside from a few stray cats, there are no other animals in sight. How can we possible appreciate the Creation when its most significant species are nowhere to be found?

What truly amazes me is why the human species never became extinct. Throughout the course of human existence, the ravages of mortality have been a known constant. Even discounting the decimation of human populations through wars and natural disasters, the effects of old age have been know. Simple reasoning alone would raise questions about bringing another soul into existence. For the rational mind, the act of procreation would seem to be cruelty of the worst kind. Bringing another soul into the world, only to have that soul go through the same torment of a finite existence, is not an act of benevolence. Had our early ancestors seen the futility of the human struggle, growing old and feeble only to expire in deterioration, they should have acted accordingly. There is an inherent desire for humans to procreate, one that clearly supersedes logic and reason. Alas, the latter is proof, perhaps, of the Creator's original intentions. If life itself was spontaneously generated, there would be no desire to continue to procreate under mortal conditions. If we ourselves are doomed to suffer a terminal fate, then why condemn our future generations to the same fate?

The day was not complete without my workout at the gym. Yet, I find myself questioning the need for a gym membership. Why, within a few years, a simple walk around the block may be too physically taxing for me. On my way out of the gym, I looked around for the hottie gym trainer. Baby was nowhere to be found. The ride on the bus back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing) took about an hour, in addition to the 30 minutes that I waited for a bus that was not completely full. Mind you, riding the bus is hardly a pleasant experience. Only those who are too young, too old, or too poor to drive can be found riding the bus. There is no etiquette on the bus, which is not surprising since the demographic is comprised mostly of the economically disenfranchised.

As fatigued as I was, I made the trek to Kahala Mall this evening. I stopped by Longs® and ended up purchasing a loaf of bread. The Asian gym hottie from a few years ago (refer to the journal) was also shopping in Longs®. Baby was still looking hot. I made the mandatory visit to my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®, as well. And, I was back in my squalid little room in Slob Manor by 9:15pm. Am I livin' large, or what?

On a sad note, moms had told me about Aunty T (on pops' side of the family). Aunty T has suffered from Alzheimer's disease for about 15 years. The family had no choice but to put her in a care facility a few years ago. At this point in time, Aunty T is incapable of ingesting food. Thus, the family has decided to discontinue any kind of feeding. They are now just waiting for the end.

In Through the Out Door

Enthusiasm on my part was clearly absent when I embarked on my journey of homeless guy emulation. I baked in the hot sun at the non-sheltered bus stop near Slob Manor (read: rental housing). Fortunately, the bus arrived within ten minutes. After completing one transfer to another bus, I was on my way to Safeway® to purchase the usual air-filled energy bars and a cup of coffee.

I am obviously making no attempt to curb my coffee consumption, nor am I doing much to cut my expenses. Frankly, I am ready to throw in the towel, so to speak. No matter what I have attempted to do to survive, I have been thwarted at every turn. I can sense the presence of low-level stress. My gut feels as though it is being slowly tied into knots. Mind you, unemployment is not the problem. I experienced the same kind of stress as a wage slave.

After completing my brunch ritual in the catacombs of Kukui Plaza, I walked to the Post Office to pay my mailbox rental fee and purchase a few postage stamps. Then, I rode the bus for three blocks to the Capitol district. I must have taken the grove of banyan trees for granted since I could recollect walking through the area. Only until I settled myself at one of the tables in the inner courtyard of the library did I realize my folly.

However, the tranquility of the library courtyard did little to quell my anxiety. I feel trapped. Knowing that the "condotel" unit is going to drain me until I am dry has possibly pushed me to the brink of chronic depression. And, I am now essentially powerless to do anything about it. I will need to return to wage slavery in order to pay the mortgage, which means that I will even more enslaved than now. Had I not purchased the dump, I would already be on the road to freedom.

What is truly laughable is that all of my preparations for the exodus, the divestiture of all of my useless possessions, the constant compacting of my survival mode, are all in vain. I've been wasting my time because I am now even more enslaved to the "system."

I don't have many "good years" left. Some of the senior citizens whom I observed in the Ka Punawai Ola care facility were not much older than me. In fact, Uncle Tosh is 77 years of age according to moms. That's just 25 years my senior. Can you imagine how quickly 25 years will fly by?

As for the "good years," what do I have? Maybe another seven years? My physique will begin rapid deterioration. The Vienna Sausage will cease functioning. And, let's face it, I will never hook up with the hottie gym trainer or any babe, for that matter. I will never be doin' da wild thing again. I may end up penniless and homeless, thanks to the "condotel" unit. One stupid move screwed up the exodus. Now, all I can do is waste time as I careen deeper and deeper into the abyss.

Then, there's the matter of moms. What if moms falls and sustains permanent injuries? What if moms becomes chronically ill? How will my bro and I deal with such issues? With moms turning 86 years of age next February, the latter issues are far from being moot.

In the end, our finite existence is what makes our lives meaningless. When we expire, our thoughts, knowledge, and experiences simply disappear. Without some kind of hope that the Creator will restore our being, there can be no true derivation of meaning. We simply exist and pursue material goals, albeit superficial, because those goals are attainable. The fruits of our labor are tangible. We can see and feel them. Yet, in the grand scheme of the universe, they are no more valuable than mere stones. What meaning is there in a stone?

I don't profess to know much. However, I will say that the fruits of our meaningless labor will not prolong our existence. Rich or poor, we will all end up suffering the debilitating effects of mortality. It is life itself, the lifeforce, that can provide meaning. We can only derive a transient, perhaps fleeting, glimpse of meaning in our 70 years of allotted time. That, too, will vanish.

Perhaps that is why I always have an innate desire to flee. I want to transcend the limitations of mortality and the accumulation of stones. I so desperately want to stop playing the idiotic games devised by the moneychangers and powers-that-be to increase the suffering of humanity. The sinister kahuna is alive and well. It is using the full power of its fury to pull all of us into the abyss via the agents of the "system." The stronger the desire to flee, the stronger the captive force becomes. In the end, we must shed everything that tethers to the "system," regardless of cost. If I was hiking alone in the wilderness and my leg was somehow wedged between boulders with no hope of lodging it free, what would I do? After a few days with no help in sight, would I find a way to amputate my leg to free myself? As morbid as the example may be, that is the metaphorical situation that I find myself to be in right now.

After my extended rumination, I walked to the gym. I did not feel any more comforted, nor did my desire to flee abate. I did my usual workout. Upon leaving the premises, I noticed the conspicuous absence of the hottie gym trainer. I was able to board a bus going directly to Slob Manor. The ride still took almost an hour. No one was home when I arrived. I was able to do the dreaded laundry chores in peace. I piddled around for a while in my squalid little room. Beans and bread were served up for dinner. Then, I made a break for Kahala Mall. The satanic gargoyles who were infesting the mall tonight were extremely rude. I spent an hour at my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. The Asian hottie "bookseller" was on duty. Baby was looking mighty fine. Alas, that's about all the excitement I could handle for the evening.

I read an interesting tidbit about the current "credit card bubble." So-called "Americans" have racked up a whopping $917 billion in credit card debt. The amount has been increasing since the bursting of the "real estate bubble." That's a mind-boggling $3,000 for every man, woman, and child in the nation. Sheesh!

Harsh Reality

Moms called early this morning to revise our itinerary for today. Instead of the usual routine, moms wanted to visit Uncle Tosh (moms' brother) in the Ka Punawai Ola rehabilitation facility in Kapolei. Uncle Tosh had fallen and broken his hip a couple of months ago. After hip surgery, he was admitted into Ka Punawai Ola for therapy. Unfortunately, the therapy is not doing much good. Uncle Tosh has essentially been bed-ridden since the surgery. In the last year, he also had surgery for kidney cancer. I stopped to put some petrol in my truck. Whoa! The price of petrol has gone up 14 cents per gallon since last week. Low grade petrol is now at $3.28 per gallon. I also purchased a cup of coffee to go at the Starbucks® in Koko Marina. Moms purchased some sushi at Kozo Sushi to give to Aunty Maria.

The drive to Kapolei was fairly quick. Moms visited with Uncle Tosh and Aunty Maria while I waited outside in the courtyard. Aunty Maria spend pretty much all day at the facility. Frankly, Uncle Tosh belongs in a care home. He no longer can take care of himself, and the staff at Ka Punawai Ola is not equipped to deal with a chronic care patient. I watched through the glass windows along the periphery of the lobby. I observed the endless line of senior citizens accompanied by nursing aides. All of the senior citizens either had walkers or were in wheelchairs. Several family members came by to visit some of the patients. A few of them wheeled their loved ones out into the courtyard. There, they were able to sit and observe the tacky fountain or to look out toward the Cali-like strip mall across the street. An old guy being wheeled around by his wife in the lobby grabbed a hold of one of the handrails against the wall. I watched as his arm quaked violently perhaps because of Parkinson's disease. All of the senior citizens looked so old and frail.

Tears welled up in my eyes. The sight of all of the fragile senior citizens exposed the superficial nature of our culture. We have "disappeared" the old folks into facilities such as Ka Punawai Ola in order to maintain the myth of eternal youth. One hour in Ka Punawai Ola is enough to make anyone understand the ravages of mortality. Little wonder why our lives are meaningless. It was then that I understood why I have been both steadfast and obstinate about spending time with moms. The precious time gives me meaning.

I did not go in to visit Uncle Tosh in his ward for a variety of reasons, one being the dismal nature of the place. After my experience of seeing pops in his last days at the hospital, I have had little desire to see any relatives in a state of decline up close. Also, moms had a chance to chat with Aunty Maria, something that she has not done in a long time. Ever since Uncle Tosh became chronically ill, he has not wanted any visitors. I walked across the street to the Cali-like strip mall and discovered that there was a Safeway® store there. I purchased a couple of energy bars because I was hungry. When I walked back, I could see moms and Aunty Maria standing at the entrance to Ka Punawai Ola. After saying our good-byes, moms and I were on our way. Moms mentioned that Uncle Tosh did not look good. I suspect that he does not have much time left.

We stopped off at Kahala Mall to eat lunch at Pearl's Korean Barbeque. It was already past noon, so we did not stay any longer. Moms served up coffee ice cream for dessert when we arrived in Hawai'i Kai. I left shortly afterward. After parking my truck on the side street near Slob Manor (read: rental housing), I rode the bus to town. I did my usual gym workout. Then, I rode the bus back to Slob Manor. I was not very hungry since the plate lunch from Pearl's was extremely filling. I piddled around until 6:45pm. Then, I rode the bus to Kahala Mall. I purchased a smoothie at Jamba Juice®, calling it dinner. Then, I sat on one of the convenient benches and ruminated about my day. Naturally, I had to seek out my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. The rest of the evening? You know the drill. Sheesh!

The truth finally comes out about the defunct "condotel" scam in Hawai'i. According to an article in the Advertiser:

Often touted as a relatively inexpensive way to invest in the state's tourism industry and own a piece of paradise, condotels represent another segment of Hawai'i's once-soaring real estate market that has landed — though for condotels the landing looks somewhat harder than the generally soft letdown seen in home resales.

Here's the punchline:

Investors, many of them speculators who didn't understand the true expenses and income for owning a hotel room, largely fed the conversion boom.

The bottom line is that the "condotel" market in collapsing in Hawai'i. I am stuck with the albatross with only two options: either pay off the mortgage in cash, or default and walk off. There is absolutely no chance that the unit will sell. By January, I expect almost the entire upper half of the Aloha Surf Hotel to be listed for sale.

Incidentally, I have finally come to realize why the Fed cannot raise interest rates as in the days when Paul Volcker was chairman. The US is way too deep in debt and, therefore, could not afford to pay the interest payments to foreign nations who hold US debt instruments if interest rates were any higher. In my ignorance, I believed that the Fed would take such measures and force an early recession. The necessary "correction" would transpire and the economy would recover. Instead, the Fed has chosen to inflate away our debts. However, an inflationary policy will slowly bring us to our demise, much like the maladies that are inflicting a slow and painful end for Uncle Tosh.

More of the Same

I suffered through more of the same insanity today. I found myself in town at 11am after an uneventful ride on the bus this morning. I procured my brunch items at Safeway®. Then, I loitered around the catacombs of Kukui Plaza. I tried to force myself to walk to the Capitol district. However, I was just not in the mood. Finally, at 1pm, I made my way to the gym. As I descended the steps into the pit of the gym, I saw the hottie gym trainer. Baby was working with a gym member. Baby is such a hottie! I felt a sudden burst of energy, no doubt because of a testosterone surge. I was able to complete my workout with vigor. Alas, the Vienna Sausage is still operational.

I ended up back at Safeway® again after I left the gym. I purchased three Tina's® frozen burritos for dinner. I rode an extremely crowded bus back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing). Bus ridership is increasing because there are more and more po' folk like the ol' lavahead. I could detail the idiocy of the bus ride, but that's just not necessary. I was extremely delighted to alight the bus. After a brief intermission for dinner, I was off to Kahala Mall. All the stores were closed except for Longs® and my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. I spent about an hour looking around at nothing before returning to Slob Manor. The rest of the evening? Same ol' shit.

Insanity

There was some kind of party in Slob Manor last night. When I woke up this morning, there was a strange guy asleep on the wooden futon frame in the second floor common area. He had his notebook computer lying on the floor. I packed my gym bag and departed at 10am. As I was leaving, I noticed another stranger sleeping on the couch on the first floor. The bus arrived on time. I alighted at Kahala Mall. I walked to my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. I purchased a large cup of coffee in the café and sat there for an hour.

I rode the bus to town and commenced the usual homeless guy routine. The library, however, was closed and will remain closed until Tuesday because of the holiday. When I alighted the bus in town, I saw the old local homeless guy sitting in the bus stop shelter. I purchased my brunch items at Safeway® and loitered around the catacombs of Kukui Plaza. At 12:45pm, I walked leisurely to the gym. I did my cardio workout. After my lukewarm shower, I exited the gym and headed straight for the bus stop. The bus arrived right as I got there. So, I was on my way back to Slob Manor without any stopovers.

I was too mentally fatigued to do much else, so I spent the rest of the day and evening in my squalid little room. There were moments that I just wanted to flee. Where would I have gone? To calm my nerves, I attended to rudimentary tasks such as personal hygiene, sorting through important paperwork, and looking for more crap to divest. Perhaps I am simply going insane.

Tangerine Dream

I was awakened at 7am this morning by a vividly bad dream in progress. In the dream, moms was moving to a care home on another island. All moms' things had already been moved. I was frantically trying to put a stop to the whole charade. Half-conscious, I bolted from my bed and checked my cell phone voicemail. Strangely, moms had indeed left a message. Fortunately, nothing was wrong. Moms invited me over for lunch at noon. Moms had a doctor's appointment early in the morning. Then, moms planned to stop off at Times Market in Kaimuki to do some shopping. I drove my truck to Kahala Mall and arrived there at 9am. I spent an hour in the Barnes & Noble® Café with a cup of coffee to keep me company.

Since Kahala Mall is a short distance away from Kaimuki, I decided to drive there. I parked my truck and, just as I was making a dash to Times Market, I saw moms walking from the direction of the bus stop. Moms mentioned that she fell again while descending the steps at the side of the building. I became quite concerned. After moms completed her grocery shopping, we were on our way to Hawai'i Kai.

As promised, moms served up leftover Beef Stew for lunch, with a side of Kim Chee. Then, coffee ice cream for dessert. I chatted with moms for a while. Then, I was on my way at 12:30pm. I parked my truck on the side street near Slob Manor (read: rental housing). I waited at the bus stop for a few minutes before hopping back in my truck. I drove to Kahala Mall, parked the truck, and rode the bus to town from there. Once in town, I walked to the library by way of the grove of banyan trees. I sat in the inner courtyard for an hour. However, my mind was preoccupied. I became extremely worried about moms. Then, I began to grasp the "big picture." The construct of "life" as sold to us by media agents of the moneychangers and the powers-that-be is a mockery. There are very few aspects of the material world that can provide proper meaning for the human experience. Our spiritual connection to our parents is foremost, yet it is downplayed as expendable in our culture. The family unit is deemed to be archaic and "dysfunctional." I believe that the family unit is the cornerstone of meaning. There can be no greater bond than between parents and their children, and vice versa.

I did my usual workout at the gym. No hottie gym trainer. Boohoo. After my workout and shower, I rode the bus back to Slob Manor. The long ride gave me ample time to ruminate even further about the "big picture." I piddled around in my squalid room before leaving for Kahala Mall at 6:45pm. I meandered around the mall again. As usual, I ended up at my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. The Asian hottie "bookseller" from several years ago is still working there. I remember seeing baby way back when. She is still a hottie, by the way. With that, I had to purchase a Coffee Frappacino from the café. I stayed on until 9:20pm. Then, my truck and I made the journey back to Slob Manor. Alas, the dump was noisy as Pete, one of the housemates, had his babe and his buddies over for a computer-synthesized jam session. Fortunately, I am on the second floor with the Indian guy. We are essentially isolated from the guys downstairs. As for me, I have my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer.

Resistance is Futile

My tanning hike had to be canceled, not because of weather conditions, but because I had left my shoes in the back of my Nissan® truck during the recent rainstorm. In fact, I had the shoes in a plastic shopping bag. The water leaked into the bag and saturated the shoes. Since I did not inspect the shoes until two days later, the smell of the foetid water had become unbearable. The shoes, of course, were already falling apart. However, I have no replacement pair for hiking.

Nonetheless, I made the trip out to Hawai'i Kai anyway. I first drove out of my way to Kahala Mall in order to indulge in a cup of coffee at the Barnes & Noble® Café. Instead of my tanning hike, I washed my truck and drove it to Koko Head park to wax it in the shade. I quickly remembered how much I despise the task. Why did I purchase a brand new truck? Why not an old jalopy? I finished just before noon. I met up with moms. We drove to Koko Marina so that moms could do some shopping. Zippy's® take-out plate lunches was on the menu today. And, coffee ice cream for dessert. Yum!

I drove back to Kahala Mall and parked my truck there. My plan was to avoid all of the buses filled with the punk school kids. Naturally, I was thwarted. I waited as three completely filled buses passed by. I finally boarded a semi-empty bus. The ride to town was excrutiatingly slow. When I disembarked, I walked directly to the gym. I did my usual workout. I left the gym at 4:30pm. No sign of the hottie gym trainer. I rode the bus to Kahala Mall. I had to transfer to another bus to continue on to Slob Manor. I decided to leave my truck in Kahala Mall and retrieve it later in the evening.

During the last leg of my journey, a heavy rain commenced. I became agitated because I could have driven my truck had I known that the weather would change so abruptly. Then, I realized that I was upset for no reason. I am, after all, a loser. Bad things always happen to losers. I rode the bus back to Kahala Mall at 6:45pm. Fortunately, the rain had abated by then. Once there, I feasted on a smoothie for dinner from Jamba Juice®. I meandered around the mall and observed that there are quite a few Apple® notebook computer users hanging out at the mall's wireless hotspots. In fact, I have noticed hella more Apple® computers lately. I was in the minority when I owned one. Now, I am in the minority with Windows® Vista. I am a true contrarian. Sheesh!

As usual, I ended up at my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®. The day is just not complete unless I wander aimlessly through the aisles to scan all of the books. Good books. Bad books. Dumb books. Classics. I feel as though I am in a Borg¹-like mind collective, the sum of which is greater than the whole. In some respect, we, the rank-and-file peons, are already living a Borg-like existence. I was rather fatigued, so I drove back to Slob Manor at 9pm. The rest of the evening? Same ol' shit.

On a lighter note, I discovered yet another flavor of Linux called Sabayon Linux, which is based upon Gentoo Linux. Why is Sabayon Linux of particular concern? Apparently, the Sabayon distro is huge and ships as a DVD. It includes everything including proprietary drivers. From what I am to understand, it is the most laptop-friendly of all the Linux distributions. Could Sabayon be slated for my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer?

¹Borg, a race of monotonous cyborgs in the fictional Star Trek universe. Every rank-and-file Borg repeats the same mantra: "You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile."

Waiting for the Shepherd

I drove my truck to Ala Moana Center fairly early this morning. By 9am, I was standing in line at the Starbucks® to purchase a large cup of coffee. Moms had her final dental appointment for a lower bridge that was fitted. I met up with moms at 11am. We ate bento lunch at Shirokiya. After lunch, moms did a little shopping at Longs®. Then, I gave moms a ride back to Hawai'i Kai. Moms served up coffee ice cream for dessert. I left immediately afterward. I dropped my truck off at Slob Manor (read: rental housing) and rode the bus to town.

I did my usual workout at the gym. Unfortunately, I did not see the hottie gym trainer. I then rode the bus back to Slob Manor. I was still full from lunch, so I piddled around for a while. At 7pm, I was on my way to Kahala Mall. I meandered around again. Mostly, I do a lot of ruminating. I continue to ponder my plight as well as my future. I often consider elaborating my thoughts in the "blog," but seldom do. With only three readers, why bother? I will just stick to brief synopses. I returned to Slob Manor at 9:30pm. For my late dinner, I ate the leftover Beef Stew that moms had given me earlier. Delicious! The rest of the night will be ... the same ol' shit.

The Fed announced that more interest rate cuts are in the works. Guaranteed. Am I surprised? No, I already predicted that the interest rates are going to be going down to near-zero percent by the middle of next year. The incursion into Iran will commence when interest rates cross below the two-percent threshold. The dollar is on a downhill slide. If it gains enough momentum, the devaluation will accelerate exponentially.

The Fed's future rate cuts will most likely invoke hyperinflation conditions and add to the dollar's downward momentum. In effect, wealth is disappearing for the rank-and-file peons. When all other prices except for real estate goes up in the next six months, there will be hell to pay. They have lost wealth as real estate prices have collapsed. Now they will suffer a pay decrease because the dollar is not worth as much. If they have any savings, its real real value is shrinking. The beauty of the crime is that it is a silent transfer of wealth from the rank-and-file peons to the elite class. The peons will never know what hit them, so they have no one to blame but themselves. Thus, there will be no revolution. More and more of the rank-and-file peons become either poor or homeless and simply disappear.

Lessons in Futility

Upon hearing two successive thuds emanating from behind the wall next to my bed, I immediately rummaged through my myriad plastic shopping bags that I used for luggage during my move to Slob Manor (read: rental housing). I found the last new pair of earplugs. I was able to sleep soundly after that. No, I have not unpacked my new sleeping bag yet.

Prior to going beddie-bye, I spent most of the evening on the Net with my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer. I made my $195 payment for six months of automobile insurance at Geico®. The premium has increased by $6 and some change. Later this month, I will have to add more minutes (about $10) to my T-Mobile® prepaid cell phone account which will extend my service for another year. I must also renew my Post Office mailbox (now $28 for six months).

I departed for town on the bus this morning at 10am. Needless to say, I followed the homeless guy itinerary beginning at Safeway®. The old local homeless guy was clinging onto a utility pole across the street from Kamali'i Park. I surmised that he has slept under the bus shelter during the past few days of heavy rain. The weather was overcast and humid. However, the reprieve from the rain was appreciated. The air was particularly crisp through the grove of banyan trees. I took several deep breaths.

The inner courtyard of the library once again proved to be the worthy sanctuary that it is. The usual cast of homeless were stationed in their usual spots, an indication that they are at the door first thing in the morning when the library opens.

I contemplated my financial plight, which immediately made me despondent. I have essentially lost control of my finances. Although I am not spending money uncontrollably on useless crap, I have been making decisions which are marginally prudent. I have also lost all desire to cut my expenses, especially with "nickel 'n dime" stuff. There is almost no point in capital preservation if that capital is denominated in dollars. With low interest rates and a devalued dollar, wealth is simply vanishing. We are also past the point of no return. The empire is hollowed out shell. "Privatization" and liquidation have left nothing to build upon. The empire's resources have been distributed to its outer edges in order to fuel its sole purpose for being ... to increase its breadth. The resources have been drained from the core. Thus, it must collapse. Knowing the latter leaves little hope for remedy.

I casually walked to the gym at 2:30pm. I did my usual workout, which is the only activity to break up the monotony of my days. I left the gym at 4:15pm. There was no sign of the hottie gym trainer. As I walked down Fort Street Mall, I immediately recognized the hottie gym trainer. Baby was on her way to the gym. She was wearing that sexy green top again. I went into testosterone shock, which, at my age, seems like a stroke. Anyway, baby was looking so hot. As I was dreaming about the hottie gym trainer while I waited at the bus stop, a bird took a dump on my gym bag. I boarded the first East-bound bus that came by. I had to transfer to another bus in Kaimuki. The slow trek back to Slob Manor is an unpleasant reminder of the reality of my impoverished life-style. Woe is me!

Once back in my squalid little room in Slob Manor, I found that I had to kick aside all of the plastic shopping bags that are sufficing as my luggage just to find something that I needed. Oh, the horror! I could not stand being in the dump much longer. I rode the bus to Kahala Mall. I walked around aimlessly. Then, for dessert, I purchased a smoothie from Jamba Juice®. And, I had to visit my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®, for an hour. I felt much better. I was able to return to Slob Manor and sit in my squalid room for the rest of the evening.

I continue to refrain from commenting on current affairs. I still read the progressive media journals, although most of the coverage is repetitive with some new supporting material. The building blocks are already in place, both politically and financially, for the secular Apocalypse to play itself out. And, as I have mentioned previously, both elements are intimately intertwined. The empire itself will eventually decline. With just five percent of the world's population, it consumes 25 percent of the world's resources. Its military consumes more petroleum resources than entire nations. If total global consumer spending was measured in dollars, the empire's satanic gargoyles spend one out of every five of those dollars (or 20 percent). This idiocy has gone on since the end of WWII because the empire essentially rewrote the rules of finance since then. However, left unchecked, greed overcame sensibility.

We are at the crossroads, the crisis point. The moneychangers and powers-that-be are doing as much occult handwaving as possible to prop up the "system." The sinister kahuna is god and father of insatiable desires. It requires infinite tribute from its disciples with which it draws its power. If the disciples cannot meet the increasing requirements of tribute, they and their brethren will be destroyed. The empire must now pillage the rest of the world to sustain the tribute. That is when it will fall. I, myself, no longer have any ideas or contingencies to avoid being sucked in by the destruction. My guess is that learning to survive, much as the homeless do, will be essential.

Drawing the Line

I neglected to mention that all of the wireless networks in the area suddenly went dead at 1am the other morning. I have no idea why, although the storm must have had something to do with it. However, I later invoked a hard reset (i.e., pulling the power supply cord out). One of the cheesy little wireless routers became functional. I have no idea where the other routers are located.

Lightning flashed through the dark sky all night long. Occasionally, the rumble of thunder could be heard as well. The rain continued on through the night with intermittent downpours saturating the the air with moisture. I decided to call it a night at 11pm.

At one o' clock in the morning, a series of dull, sporadic thuds awakened me. The sound was coming from behind the wall next to my bed. Slob Manor (read: rental housing) has two attached studio apartments, the tenants of which share nothing but a common wall with us in the house. One of the idiotic tenants was engaged in a slammin' soirée, if you can believe it. Will I ever escape from these lunatics? The benign activity continued non-stop until 5am. Then, all was silent. I was extremely groggy when I finally got out of bed at 8am.

I drove my truck to Kahala Mall. I could hardly wait to take my first sip of coffee at the Barnes & Noble® Café. After my jolt of cafeine, I met up with moms. We ate lunch at the Panda Express®. After lunch, I gave moms a ride back to Hawai'i Kai. We stopped off at Foodland so that moms could do some grocery shopping. My bro had apparently returned from work early because the job site was rained out. Although his truck was parked out front, he was not at home. Moms served up some coffee ice cream for dessert. I departed shortly afterward.

I drove back to Slob Manor and dropped off my truck. My gym bag and I were on our way to town on the bus. The weather looked as though it cleared up. However, I carried my umbrella anyway. I ended up in the inner courtyard of the library for an hour. Frankly, I was too fatigued to enjoy the surroundings. When I finally decided to walk to the gym, a light rain began to fall. Within a block of the gym, I had my umbrella up and open. Rain was coming down hard. I did my usual workout. The rain was still going strong when I walked out of the gym. Fortunately, I was able to immediately board an East-bound bus. The rain cleared up in the vicinity of the McCully district. I was certain that the sky would be clear before I had to disembark.

Boy, was I ever wrong! The rain turned into a huge downpour just after Kahala Mall. I did not alight at my usual stop. The rain was coming down so hard that I figured that it was better for me to stay on the bus and get off on the other side of Kalani'ana'ole Highway on its return trip. Once again, my plans were foiled. The bus driver announced that the bus was going out of service in Hawai'i Kai. I had to disembark at Koko Marina. There was, thankfully, only a slight drizzle at the time. I crossed the street to wait at the bus stop. A gorgeous young hottie in a short jeans skirt was standing there. Within a few minutes, the Route 58 bus arrived. I was on my way to Slob Manor.

Once in Slob Manor, I dropped off my gym bag and haphazardly washed my gym clothes. After hanging the clothes up to dry, I drove my truck to the Sports Authority® in Kaka'ako. I purchased a cheap $15 sleeping bag (made in China). The reason? Whenever the slammin' soirée starts up, I am taking the sleeping bag out into the upstairs common area to sleep in it. As a matter of fact, I am giving all of the bedding back to moms, including the bedding that I had purchased for use in my old prison cell (read: little shoebox) in Quagmire Prison (read: hotel). The sleeping bag will effectively be my bed from now on, just as it was during my tenure in the Roach Motel back in Convalescent City. I then drove to CompUSA® to browse the aisles. The place was packed with shoppers who were spending money like there's no tomorrow. I perused the selection of sleeve-type cases for notebook computers. The price was way too high for my budget. I also noticed that I was the only person who was not approached by any salesperson. I guess I must really look homeless. Frankly, I did not want to be bothered by any of the fools.

I contemplated the idea of stopping off at Ala Moana Center for old times' sake. The time was only 7pm, which I knew would only guarantee a huge crowd of idiotic shoppers. I opted to stop off at Kahala Mall instead. Once there, I was too fatigued and too hungry to stay much longer than an hour. I even visited my safe haven, Barnes & Noble®, again. On the way back to Slob Manor, I made a quick stop at Foodland to purchase food items for dinner. Alas, once I set foot in Slob Manor, I was in for the night.

I enjoyed my visit with moms today. I noticed that, wherever we go, moms always knows someone in the vicinity. That's why moms does not want to leave Hawai'i Kai. That's home for moms. I believe that moms and even some of her friends know that I am not actively seeking a return to wage slavery because the latter would interfere with my visitation times with moms. Yes, my semi-retirement is now costing me dearly. However, I should be able to return to some kind of peon job and regain my solvency. My time with moms, though, is not replaceable.

Tough Choices

About an hour after I returned to Slob Manor (read: rental housing), a huge downpour commenced. The rain continued non-stop throughout the night. By morning, the rain had not abated. I had two choices. I could drive my Nissan® Frontier truck to Hawai'i Kai, procure my brunch items at Safeway® in Kuapa Kai, and do my workout at the gym in Koko Marina. Or, I could drive downtown, pay $3 for parking, procure my brunch items at Safeway®, do my workout at gym, and catch a glimpse of the hottie gym trainer. Tough choices, eh? So, I was on my way to town.

The rain actually subsided the closer I approached town. In fact, the sky was starting to clear up just as I pulled into the Kukui Plaza parking structure. Was it worth the trip? Well, when I walked into the gym, I saw the hottie gym trainer working with a gym member. As I walked past her, I could not help but notice how gorgeous she is. I went into testosterone shock. I had intrusive thoughts about baby during my workout. As a matter of fact, I have added a bicep/tricep routine to my Sunday workout. Thus, I am able to stay longer in the gym. After my workout, I walked back toward Kukui Plaza. I wanted to drop off my gym bag in the truck. If I am paying for parking, I might as well spend the whole afternoon in town, I reasoned. Along the way, I ran into Pseudo-professor Mike. He was attempting to load a large box and a handtruck on the top of his car. When I saw how the latter and former were perched precariously on the roof, I suggested that he just wheel the box back to his place with the handtruck. He invited me to stop by later.

I dropped off my gym bag, and ended up looking around Longs® and Ross® for no particular reason. At 4pm, I met up with pseudo-professor Mike at the entrance to his place. What was supposed to be a brief visit ending up being much longer. Pseudo-professor Mike whipped together a delicious Beef Stroganoff dish. Along with a tossed salad and wine, all the food groups were represented at the meal. The meal was fit for a king. We ended up chatting about a variety of topics. However, at 7pm, there was a sudden downpour. I looked out the window and could barely see the adjacent buildings. The streets below were flooding. I waited a few minutes until the rain subsided a little. Then, I bid farewell to Pseudo-professor Mike.

Water was flowing everywhere as I walked back to Kukui Plaza. The heavy rain started up again just as I entered the building. The drive back to Slob Manor was hampered by some flooding on the surface streets and the H-1 freeway. I arrived safe and sound, even though I had consumed a few glasses of wine. Because of the rain and the late hour, I had no choice but to spend the rest of the evening at Slob Manor. Fortunately, I had my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer to keep me company. Too bad the hottie gym trainer doesn't want to come around, eh?

Law of Diminishing Returns

Last night, I was able to procure an electric fan that was sitting around downstairs in Slob Manor (read: rental housing). I placed the fan in my squalid little room. Within about 30 minutes of deployment, the sweltering temperature subsided. This is only temporary housing, I keep telling myself, which is true. I am on a month-to-month lease. And, I can be out of the dump by the end of December if necessary. Then again, where would I go?

My first attempt to follow the full homeless guy itinerary with Slob Manor as a starting point was a lesson in frustration. Once again, I had to wait at the bus stop with no shelter. Fortunately, the sky was overcast. I did not have to deal with the sun's excessive photon emissions. I had no choice but to observe the horrendous traffic in both directions along Kalani'ana'ole Highway. I surmised that the Saturnalia shopping season has officially commenced.

The bus arrived on time. The trip to town took about an hour. I also had to transfer to another bus in town to avoid an additional two-block walk. Once I alighted, I made my way to Safeway® via Kamali'i Park. While I ate my usual brunch in the concrete catacombs of Kukui Plaza, I realized that I forgot to pack my toothbrush in my gym bag. I became agitated. I have no dental plan. I don't have the luxury of neglecting my teeth.

I did not see the old local homeless guy until I was on my way to the Capitol district. He was apparently passed out on the sidewalk by the dividing wall. The old building that housed Detox, Shirley's old watering hole, was being demolished. I watched the action for a few minutes. Did I mention that the downtown Taco Bell® is no more? I consumed my share of Cheesy Bean and Rice Burritos there.

I was barely cognizant of the beauty of the gardens and the grove of banyan trees. I simply glided through the greenery in a comatose state. Not until I was sitting in the inner courtyard of the library did I realize the missed opportunity to enjoy the beauty of nature. Why do we take the Creation for granted?

The library was packed with the homeless, more than usual. The restrooms were backlogged as a result. I also came to the realization that I cannot commute back and forth to town as I when I was incarcerated at Quagmire Prison (read: hotel) in Waikiki. Hence, I am now even closer to the homeless life-style. I must carry everything that I need for a full day in my small gym bag.

There are other sad aspects concerning my move to Slob Manor. Aside from being completely filthy, the whole place has an odd odor. The offensive smell permeates everything, be it clothes, hair, skin. I could still smell the sickening odor while I sat in the courtyard. In contrast, the smell of the manure compost was refreshing. On the other hand, I have slept much more soundly, no longer requiring the use of ear plugs.

I sat at a table next to one occupied by a recently homeless haole guy. He is in his fifties. He is cleanly dressed and his luggage is fairly new. The first time that I saw him in the library was sometime last week. Sadly, as I sat there, I noticed that he began talking to himself about 30 minutes later.

I decided to stay in town as long as possible, so I did my cardio workout at the gym a little later than usual. In fact, I am contemplating a shift in overall gym schedule to a later time as well. The bus ride home was a little frustrating. I was able to board a bus heading to Kahala Mall fairly quickly, but I waited a long time for the connecting bus. Alas, I arrived back at Slob Manor at 5pm.

Everything that I own is lying on the fake laminate floors. There are a few pieces of decrepit furniture. I use the desk for my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer, but that's about it. The is a twin-size mattress and box spring lying on the floor as well. I actually sleep on that thing. Moms gave me sheets and a mattress pad to fit the small bed. I will give moms my Queen-size set. I really have no desire to clean up the mess. Frankly, I am ready to dump the whole mess into the trash can.

The ambiance of Slob Manor is both demoralizing and depressing. I have taken a huge drop in my standard-of-living. However, I should know better. I am previewing my future. This is just a stepping stone into the abyss of poverty. And, isn't poverty what all monks desire? With that, I popped open a can of beans to eat with a few slices of bread. I'm used to the prison food after my long incarceration. With nothing else better to do, I rode the bus to Kahala Mall for a carbon copy of last night's adventure. Barnes & Noble® extended its hours, most likely for the Saturnalia shopping season. I can honestly say that I enjoyed my evening at Barnes & Noble®. I returned to Slob Manor at 10pm and noted how dismal the place was. Only the new guy who moved in yesterday was sitting downstairs and watching the tube. There is no obligation for any of us to be friends or to hang out with each other, which pleases me. Aside from polite conversation, I have done nothing else to socialize. I will, in fact, increase my social distance from the other boarders. That's why I have my notebook computer. Sheesh!

As I suspected, none of the lower end "condotel" units are moving. In fact, there has been little activity at all. Units already in the escrow pipeline are the only ones disappearing from the listings. I have definitely missed the window of opportunity to sell the place. I will be stuck with the albatross for a long time. Worst yet, as the Fed continues to lower short-term interest rates, my ability to sustain the mortgage payments will diminish.