Just Me & My Computers

From the time I arrived back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing) at 3pm yesterday afternoon until 9:30pm, Brian was stomping back and forth on the second floor from some point just above my squalid room to either one of the two bedrooms or the other end of the common area. Back and forth. Back and forth. Every now and then, he took a short break to watch his widescreen LCD tube. Then, back and forth. Back and forth. He appeared to be unpacking stuff from several boxes, but he is moving one unpacked item at a time. I don't even know how long he was at it before I arrived back at the dump. As I said prior, the guy is a meathead. Why else would he stand outside in the driveway only in his underwear?

Another visit to Hawai'i Kai went well. Moms and I ate lunch at Panda Express®. Later, moms served Welcome® vanilla ice cream for dessert. The rest of the day? The urban nomad fulfilled his usual benign functions and followed his routine itinerary as planned.

Back at Slob Manor, the young Asian hottie made a brief visit this evening. She broke a few of Brian's new dishes, which were lying around anyway, and made a lot of noise in the kitchen as she prepared a special baked treat for her boyfriend. Alan was apparently lying on the couch when she arrived. He attempted to make smalltalk, but she was too preoccupied with the task at hand. I have never spoken to her, nor has she attempted to make conversation. As far as I can gather, she's completely enraptured by the boyfriend. Young love, you say? Oh brother.

Honestly, I could never go through an ordeal with any babe. I'm not cut out for that relationship nonsense or that romance crap. The latter and former are human concoctions to legitimize the "inner animal" lust. That's why the success ratio of long-term monogamous relationships is so low. No thanks. I'll take my vast hurdy-gurdy video collection instead.

Well, here's an interesting assessment of the ol' lavahead by a guy named Steven Mon from Gaithersburg Maryland:

It's kind of a strange blog -- I mean, everyone has problems, but this guy has real problems. The decisions he makes -- they often leave you scratching your head. And the fact that he seemed to be going through things that most people work their way through in their twenties -- while he was starting his forties -- well, it's just kind of odd.

That's from his "blog" called Anomie Train Studio (February 22nd). He's also on Facebook and Myspace, along with another creation called Losertown. Mon's "blog" goes back about four years, so I'll probably take some time to read all of it. What else do I have to do?

On a final note, I should mention that KDE "plasma" netbook is running without a hitch. Out of sheer foolishness, I decided to reinstall the bulk of the applications that I previously uninstalled. There's a lot more integration in KDE than I earlier thought. Although I won't use any of those applications, I want to review the entire integrated desktop. In two months, I will be upgrading to the version of Kubuntu with the latest KDE release. Yeah, just me and my computers.

Wink of an Eye

"See that guy in the back getting off the bus right now," the bus driver announced to the tourists sitting in the front on the Route 23 bus just as I was about to alight near Kawaikui Beach Park. "He's a rich guy. He lives up on Hawai'i Loa Ridge." Then, he started laughing. I was laughing, too. Just a few minutes earlier, he was pointing out the sights to the tourists. I was surprised to see him driving the 2pm route from Ala Moana Center, where I boarded. I had ridden his Route 23 bus this morning. In fact, he had flashed the "Not in Service" message on the signage before stopping. We had a good laugh. The other passengers were probably wondering what was so funny. He usually drives the 3:30pm Route 1 bus on Saturday afternoon, which I ride to return to Slob Manor (read: rental housing). Twice, he pulled the "not in service" prank on me, and I almost fell for it both times. That is, until he gave himself away when he started laughing.

Typical "Wink of an Eye" Hottie

Another urban nomad kind-of-a-Sunday disappeared in a wink of an eye with nothing noteworthy of mention. When I arrived back at Slob Manor, I could hear Brian's widescreen LCD tube blaring away upstairs. The fool was stomping around back and forth almost continuously doing who-knows-what. Every now and then, he would drop some kind of heavy object on the floor. Brian has a lot of money and a lot of meat between the ears. Well, he's a meathead.

Three hours later, meathead is still doing the same thing. Insanity? You think so? He is most likely in the process of "moving in." With all of that money, he should have purchased his own house. Instead, he spent literally thousands of dollars on designer furniture to be placed in an ant-infested dump. Heck, the landlord has already been wondering whether Brian will be in the house day and night, watching the tube, and running up the utilities.

The landlord was also asking about the young Asian hottie. I told the landlord that I didn't know much. I've only seen the young Asian hottie all of 20 seconds since she's moved in. The landlord did clarify that baby's boyfriend does a lot of travelling. Whenever he's gone, then she will spend the time in Slob Manor. Let's hope that he's not gone all that much, eh?

On a side note, I have reverted back to the KDE "plasma" netbook desktop in Kubuntu after much deliberation. Frankly, I was perplexed at how quickly I had dismissed the netbook interface as being too unintuitive. Turns out, the "plasma" netbook interface is extremely elegant. There are only a couple of annoyance. First, dialog boxes are maximized to fill the screen just like application windows. Second, the desktop panel preferences windows have a strange black background. Overall, though, the KDE "plasma" netbook desktop is quite impressive (refer to above link). The animations are nice, too, and seem to be accomplished without a compositor.

I spoke too soon. A third annoyance is that the rekonq browser is crashing often in the "plasma" netbook interface. I had absolutely no crashes when in the normal "plasma" desktop. Nonetheless, my Acer® Aspire One netbook can be deployed as a primary computer. Now if only I would take my mortality more seriously and get on with the exodus already. Sheesh!

Consciousness

Not much has changed in the past few days. I am still wasting a lot of precious time. I continue to piddle around with my computers, although little progress has been made to resolve any issues particularly with Kubuntu. I have not divested any of my remaining useless possessions. Neither have I done anything to improve my lot in life. And, I continue to ponder and reflect on matters of which I have no control.

There has been little progress in reducing or eliminating my vast hurdy-gurdy video collection as well. Clearly, the latter is an example of "free will," or the lack of it. The hurdy-gurdy collection serves no purpose because it is stored on a portable hard drive which is only plugged into a computer for file transfers. Thus, the hurdy-gurdy collection is only an archive. What good is that? If the portable hard drive were to suddenly fail, I probably wouldn't miss it. So, why maintain the hurdy-gurdy collection in the first place?

Overall, though, the most sickening aspect of the current situation is my heavy reliance upon computers. I spend hours, literally a waste of a life, in front of a computer screen for no particular purpose. Since I don't watch the tube, don't have a social life, don't have any hobbies, and don't have lots of money, I am limited to any option that can substitute for the aforementioned. The only cost effective solution has been the computer. Yet, the computer gives me lots of grief. I can't seem to find an operating system that suits my needs (i.e., minimalistic) and functions as expected. Instead, I am spending hours looking for solutions to the most ludicrous problems. Perhaps the upcoming version of Kubuntu will exhibit better stability.

Another urban nomad kind-of-a-day has come to pass. Nothing noteworthy to report. In other words, same ol' shit. Mundane routine aside, I have maintained my promise to remain both hypervigilant and keenly observant of my surroundings. My eyes scan everything. I observe the tree and their magnificent shapes. I stop to peruse flowers in bloom. I watch the birds coming and going. I even observe tiny insects scurrying about. I try to listen for natural sounds, but the latter is masked by the noise of "civilization." I attempt to smell the freshness of nature, but I am usually thwarted by cigarette smoke. As I stated prior, I am attempting to experience life even though I am stuck in a cesspool.

Even while I am eating my paltry lunch in the coconut grove in the Capitol district, I spend my time watching the birds, feeling the blades of grass in my hands, or looking at the odd characteristics of the trunks of each coconut tree. I never grow tired of the task. I continue to take in treasured views of this planet of life, my only small window of time allotted to me perhaps in the remaining time before the sun goes red star. I can't help but feel sad that we'll never see this planet again once we're gone.

Consciousness is both a strange and amazing quality, isn't it? I have been pondering the meaning of consciousness for several weeks now. Mind you, I have already concluded that both the soul and consciousness are mortal. They don't live on in a "spirit" world. Where would they go? And, why or how were both confined to the earth? From what I can tell, consciousness (i.e., self-awareness) grows with age. In infancy, we are essentially nothing, the ideal tabula rasa. We grow into human beings in time. Yet, we a still a species of animal.

I don't want to sound like Christopher Hitchens, but religion is the problem. Pauline-Christianity is the worst manufacturer of elaborate lies about the soul and mortality. Even Judaism made no such claims. Much of the nonsense has a "pagan" origin. Yet, the basis of those beliefs go even further back into prehistory. It is so embedded into the culture of humanity that it cannot be easily purged. We have all been subliminally assimilated.

The God of the Yahweh Triad (i.e., Judaism, Pauline-Christianity, and Islam) does not exist. If I haven't stated that fact explicitly before, then I am doing so now. If we reject the idea of spontaneous generation of both the universe and life, then we can only accept benign creation. An entity is not necessary for benign creation to occur, although there is an implication of guidance. And, even if an entity is involved, the latter has not made itself known. A few diehard religious fanatics may argue that the Unholy Scriptures is the conduit to that entity. A ludicrous claim. The specific genealogy of the Unholy Scriptures places the origin of humans at about 6,000 years ago, a time when there were already large numbers of people in Asia as well as in and around Mesopotamia. If the chronology of the Unholy Scriptures is incorrect, then it has discredited itself.

Actually, does it really matter if we accept or reject either spontaneous generation or benign creation? Does it change anything? Does it make us any less mortal? Will that keep the sun from going red star on us? The beauty of consciousness is that it allows to able to enjoy life. It did not elevate us above the other animals as we have have tried to fool ourselves into believing. Yet, with the seemingly boundless quality of consciousness, we should have figured out the absolute truths (refer to the "blog" of July 28th of last year) a long time ago. What happened?

Readership Project

Last night, from my squalid room at Slob Manor (read: rental housing), I heard the young Asian hottie return from parts unknown. Brian happened to be downstairs and introduced himself. Baby then fumbled around noisily in the kitchen before abruptly leaving. Later, I discovered that she had removed all of her food from the fridge. The rice cooker was conspicuously absent. And, she even cleaned the dirty dishes that she had left in the sink for three days. I surmised that I was correct in my assumption that she recently had a tiff with the boyfriend. They must have ironed out their differences. Frankly, I don't think that she had any other option. I'm sure that she does not enjoy residing in the dump that is Slob Manor. Worst yet, having to occupy the same living space with three decrepit old geezers. Oh, the horror!

Another visit to Hawai'i Kai went well. Moms and I ate lunch at Zippy's. Later, moms served Welcome® vanilla ice cream for dessert. The rest of the day? The urban nomad fulfilled his usual benign functions and followed his routine itinerary as planned.

By the way, I have been attempting to determine the number of legitimate readers who visit the site using the Feedjit® Live Feed. Here is the result:

• Hawaii (2)
• California (3)
• Washington (1)
• Nevada (1)
• South Dakota (1)
• Michigan (1)
• Massachusetts (1)
• New York (1)
• Tennessee (1)
• Maryland (1)
• North Carolina (1)
• Netherlands (1)
• United Kingdom (1)
• Japan (1)

I had been observing the data over the past few months. Curiosity, and lack of anything else to do, drove me to pursue the project. The rest of the visitors are looking for babe pictures. Well, I'd like to express my appreciation to all seventeen of you who stop by to share in the existential vacuum of the "blog." And, a belated welcome is in order as well.

Existential Vacuum Cleaner Redux

Flash flood warnings and heavy rain forecasts were in effect for O'ahu from yesterday morning. The day proved to be hot, humid, and calm. The thundershowers finally hit last night at 11:05pm, going from relative calm to extremely heavy rainfall instantaneously. I was, of course, safely locked in my squalid room. Brian, the clown who rents the entire second floor, was stomping around like a trapped zoo animal and clearing his throat loudly every few seconds. The rain lasted all of 30 minutes.

Typical Existential Hottie

Another urban nomad kind-of-a-day, another existential vacuum. Nothing out of the ordinary transpired, except that I was able to find the energy to sashay down to the Institute of Hair Design in order to restore my extreme monk haircut. The student who cut my hair spent about an hour to accomplish the task. She kept running the clippers over the entire oversized cranium continuously, chafing my scalp. I almost thought that I would not have time for my gym workout. The ride back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing) this afternoon was over an hour due to traffic as a result of a traffic accident.

When I set foot in Slob Manor, I could hear Brian's huge widescreen LCD tube blaring away upstairs. His brand new Ford® Mustang was parked on the rock pile. A few minutes later, a large truck backed into the driveway. Two guys unloaded all kinds of new furniture. Not the cheap stuff, mind you, but the expensive designer variety. All of it went upstairs. According to the landlord, Brian is receiving permanent disability benefits. In addition, he has received a huge settlement from his former employer. Brian was formerly a pest control guy. So, with all of the new wealth that he has acquired, Brian has been spending money freely on anything and everything. Brian also owns a dog, a dubious requirement of his rehabilitation therapy. Oddly, I observed Brian standing outside in the driveway with his dog at 7:40am this morning as I was walking to the bus stop. He was only wearing his underwear. Sheesh!

Well, I continue to waste precious time. Actually, frozen in inaction is more accurate. At the library, I took a break from my reading list and perused an archaeology picture book. I almost cannot articulate just how affected I am by visions of the distant past. There's just too much that we don't know. Essentially, given our mortality, there is no reason to know anything. Would such knowledge change anything? Not really. We just need to live our lives with all the mundane distractions until we keel over.

Speaking of distractions, Linux Mint has released its latest KDE version based on Ubuntu "Maverick Meerkat." However, I find no reason to switch from Kubuntu for now. So far, so good.

Post No. 1,760

I did not get to sleep until after 1am this morning because the young Asian hottie decided to perform her laundry chores after 10pm. The washer and dryer are right outside the door to my squalid room. Baby's squalid room is across from mine. Oddly, baby departed earlier than I did this morning. Apparently, sleep deprivation is not an issue for her.

Another visit to Hawai'i Kai went well. Moms and I ate lunch at Panda Express®. My Panda Express® fortune cookie's prediction: "You will soon receive help from an unexpected source." From whom, pray tell? Later, moms served Welcome® vanilla ice cream for dessert. The rest of the day? The urban nomad fulfilled his usual benign functions and followed his routine itinerary as planned.

Incidentally, my sister-in-law is no longer working in town. Her final day at the law firm was on Friday. My nephew is on another disciplinary suspension for a few weeks because of his alleged involvement in a food fight in the high school mess hall. He claims that he's innocent. Well, guilty or not, he's now stigmatized as a delinquent. The next incident will get him expelled. My bro has started using chewin' tobaccy again. No idea why.

In the distractions department, I ran the "live" version of Bohdi Linux last night since I was up late. The included themes were esoteric, but I was suitably impressed. That is, until I opened a couple of applications (only three are included). Whoa! Shades of Gnome®! The GTK+ look just doesn't match Enlightenment at all. I am certain that further customization is possible. Why bother? Thus, I have decided to remain loyal to Kubuntu.

5 Kayeb 12 Eb

(12.19.18.2.12) All I can say is that I had an unexciting return to the urban nomad routine. At the library, I spent most of my time lapsing in and out of a coma in the inner courtyard. "Fatigue" is my middle name. Ol' Fatigue Lavahead. Yeah, I've been really fatigued lately. I cannot even bring myself to accomplish the most trivial tasks like shopping for food or restoring my monk haircut. I'm really tired of being a slave of the "system." My workout at the gym was also a trying task. Frankly, I don't just don't know anymore.

Back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing), nothing was happening. Just the way I like it. The young Asian hottie and Brian, the guy who resides upstairs, were apparently in the dump last night. So, we have a full house. During the day, Alan appears to be only person around. Is the situation improving? Slightly. However, there is no escaping the fact that Slob Manor is a detestable hovel.

Well, there's always more computer mumbo-jumbo to keep me occupied during the incredibly long dull spots of the mendicant life-style. I downloaded the latest version of Bodhi Linux, although it is still only a "beta release candidate." Bodhi is Ubuntu-based, but uses the Enlightenment desktop. I ran Bodhi "live." It's fast and elegant. And, best of all, it is entirely spartan. My only concern, of course, is power management. I'll be investigating the matter later, that's for sure. No install, though, until the stable release.

Overall, I am somewhat pleased with Kubuntu. I really like the KDE interface. Heck, I may eventually switch to Kubuntu on my aging Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer. I am using a crippled version of Ubuntu "Karmic Koala" that is due to be completely deprecated in two months. The only problem with Kubuntu is power management, just like Ubuntu. However, Kubuntu power managment is fully functioning after one reboot. Not ideal, but workable.

On a final note, I am on the verge of erupting in a violent rampage. I have never felt so trapped as I do now. I am fooling around with my computers in order to calm the "inner animal." I'm afraid, though, that the "inner animal" wants to break free. I've done everything that I could to fool myself into believing that I am breaking out of the ménagerie (i.e., exodus), but it's not working too well. Tonight, I also squished over a hundred of those tiny black bugs with the same filthy rag that I used to squish the sugar ants. The "inner animal" is only minutely appeased by such a benign activity. However, that's all I have. Well, I have the "blog," too. Sheesh!

Holiday Hullabaloo

I was on my way to New City Nissan® in Kalihi at 7:45am this morning. I stopped off at the Aina Haina Shopping Center to purchase a cup of coffee and a couple of muffins at Foodland Farms. I even arrived early at the dealership. I had the whole day planned out accordingly, but it was thwarted by foolishness. According to Matt, my "service representative," there was an overbooking of appointments. So, My Nissan® Frontier truck would not be ready until 2pm. What could I do?

I leisurely ate one of the muffins and sipped on my coffee in the waiting area. At about 9am, I rode the courtesy shuttle to Ala Moana Center with gym bag in hand. I spent an hour or so in Barnes & Noble®. Then, I rode the bus to town. I performed my usual workout at the gym. I was certainly glad to be back at the downtown location.

After my workout, I ran into the Indian guy right outside the building. He was on lunch break. At 1:30pm, the courtesy shuttle arrived to pick me up across the street. Once back at the dealership, I retrieved my truck. Aside from the recall repair, I had the bogus "safety check" done. I chatted with Matt, the "service representative," for a couple of minutes. He asked about the gym, since I had just finished working out. He said that he had a gym membership, but never saw me at the one across from Ala Moana Center. I told him that I go to the downtown branch. He then mentioned that he used to go to the gym after work, usually late at night. At that time, he was employed at the former Osake Sushi Bar. Apparently, he was working on the night of the infamous shooting four years ago. Another part-time employee, who was also a deputy sheriff, was fatally shot (refer to Honolulu Advertiser archives for details). "You always think that it happens just like in the movies," he said. "But, in real life, it's definitely not the same thing."

Prior to departing from the dealership, I looked around at all of the new vehicles. Nothing really interested me. I am satisfied with my truck for now. I wanted to return to Ala Moana Center, but the destination was way out of my way. The place would be packed with idiots anyway. So, I stopped off at the second worst option, Kahala Mall. The place was packed, but I was able to secure a shaded parking space immediately. By then, I was completely famished and feeling queasy. To satisfy my hunger, I ate an early dinner at Subway®. I visited Barnes & Noble® again for no particular reason. Well, at least the hottie bookseller was on duty. Baby was looking mighty fine, by the way.

I was back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing) by 3:30pm. I immediately locked myself in my squalid room. Another holiday weekend has come and gone. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Mostly a waste of precious time. Tonight, I'll distract myself with more computer mumbo-jumbo. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

Reinventing the Wheel

A very unexciting Sunday indeed, with a minor modification to the usual itinerary. From Ala Moana Center, I walked to the gym across the street. Yesterday, there was a sign posted at the gym which stated that the downtown branch would be closed for repairs until 2pm this afternoon. So, that's why I had to modify my itinerary. Oddly, I did not see any members from the downtown gym during the entire time. Surely, at least a handful would have been present. Nada. I surmised that the repairs were probably completed earlier than expected. Oh well.

As for the rest of the day, I had absolutely no incidents with mental midgets, not even one. Yet, there were plenty of people around, no matter where I went. So, what happened between yesterday and today? Was there a full moon out, or what?

Back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing), all was quiet. The new guy who rents the entire second floor has only been around one night so far. That was Friday. The young Asian hottie is now spending a lot of time in her squalid room. Baby has been here for three consecutive nights. She was home all day today, too, doing who-knows-what. She has also stocked food in the fridge and put a lot of cookware in the kitchen. She even has a rice cooker. From what I can tell, she's been eating her meals at Slob Manor. What happened to the boyfriend? Did they have a falling out on Valentine's Day? Only time will tell.

I can barely articulate how unnerved I have been lately. Yes, I have been pondering mortality again, not just my mortality per se. Rather, I have been developing the "big picture," which now incorporates the universe. I have to say that the authors of the Unholy Scriptures were absolutely correct when they derived the axiom, "He who increases knowledge also increases pain." Not a day goes by now without a heavy integration of the sum of my feeble knowledge. Yet, I can't seem to grasp anything. I have tried to deconstruct the whole into smaller component parts, but that is really no longer possible. The whole is the smallest component part.

Mortality, of course, is most interesting to me. We humans have been given one small window of time to experience "life." There seems to be no purpose. Nor have any of us been given any special consideration about where and when we appeared. The "life" we so value is simply the sum of our experiences all laid down in memory. Yet, in the grand scheme, "life" has no meaning. It can't have any because it is fleeting and temporary. It only has a relative meaning for the individual who possesses it.

I am in awe that I have been able to witness "life" from a viewpoint within the short time frame that I have been allotted. It will be the only time that I will see the earth and universe for what they are. Imagine that we will never see this solar system or the earth again. Even if reincarnation were possible, we certainly would not be coming back as ourselves. I'd be an entirely different person. And, I may not come back before the whole solar system is gone, after the sun becomes a gigantic red star. I can't imagine the earth and the sun vanishing. I can't imagine all traces of life disappearing. I first approached the entire topic objectively, but I gradually became emotionally involved. A great sadness, melancholia, overcame me. I just don't understand. I can't understand.

I know that I am "reinventing the wheel." I am converging on the same point that many great and not-so-great thinkers did over the eons when humans actually had the luxury of time to think. Imagine if the great and not-so-great thinkers had access to the knowledge that we have available to us now. They would literally go berserk. They would not be able to postulate a single answer to any philosophical question. They would effectively be lost. And, so am I.

Kubuntu has not left me with any answers either. I thought of downloading another KDE-based "distro." Why bother? I have searched the forums of various "distros" and found the same kinds of problems listed. My only conclusion is that Linux is just not meant to run on notebook or netbook computers. There are just too many variations in the hardware. The developers just can't keep up with the modifications.

As far as power management is concerned, I learned that KDE v4.5 requires HAL (read: hardware abstraction layer). That's probably why power managment is less intermittent in Kubuntu. In the Gnome®-based Ubuntu, HAL has been deprecated in favor of upower. Thus, in Ubuntu, neither the battery or brightness functions are detected pretty much all of the time. The next version of Kubuntu will feature KDE v4.6 which does not require HAL. Will we see the same power management problems migrate to Kubuntu? Most likely. Is it time to give up and go back to the "other" operating system?

Losers & Mental Midgets

When I arrived at Ala Moana Center this morning at 8:30am, I ran into Joseph, the Iraqi guy, and his limerant object along the main promenade. I chatted with them briefly. I was following the Sunday urban nomad itinerary because of the holiday weekend. Thus, I ended up at the gym much earlier than usual for Saturday.

Typical Holiday Hottie

Upon exiting the gym at noon, I entered a strange world of stupidity. There was a proliferation of mental midgets just as there was a proliferation of losers. Sitting at the bus stop in front of Chinatown Gateway Plaza, I was privy to several minutes of cigarette smoke emanating from an old loser sitting just a few feet away, obviously upwind. The fossilized fool looked so catatonic that I didn't bother to read him the riot act. He was probably going to keel over at any moment anyway.

I boarded a bus that was heading to Ala Moana Center, but alighted just a block away. The unbelievable collective stupidity of the passengers was astounding. No words could adequately describe the level of mental midgetry that I was privy to witness. I was able to board another bus shortly afterward on Bishop Street. Ala Moana Center was completely packed, and the reign of stupidity permeated the entire shopping complex. From fat slobs lumbering about in a metronome fashion to psychotic cigarette-smoking clowns talking to themselves, I was inundated with people whose entire cognitive functioning had been supplanted by too much fast food, excessive shopping for useless junk, and marathon tube-watching. The spectacle was not even remotely comical. It was pathetic. How can people end up so stupid?

There was definitely no shortage of losers no matter where I was. I am not a "winner," but the kind of fools that I observed in mass numbers would elevate even a simpleton like the ol' lavahead way up the so-called "food chain." What has brought the contemporary human animal to flounder in such a humiliating regression?

I tried to eat my ice cream treat in peace as I sat on one of the benches facing the parking area in front of Sears®. Mind you, I had to navigate through crowds of bumbling morons at Foodland in order to purchase the ice cream treat. Within seconds, the psychotic ho' who was talking loudly to herself lit up a cigarette. Smoke wafted in my direction immediately. I briskly walked to the bus stop with my ice cream treat. I could have said something to the psychotic ho', but exactly what would she be able to comprehend? As I sat on one of the concrete benches, one of the kids in family of idiots started running amuck. He ran right in front of me, almost knocking the small container of ice cream out of my hands. A few minutes later, a crappy "riceboy" complete with hollowed out mufflers drove past a parked vehicle and set off its ridiculous alarm. The alarm didn't shut down for almost five minutes, all the while blasting the horn just about 25 feet away from the bus stop. The endless chain of shoppers who just purchased extremely large widescreen LCD tubes were filing out of Sears® non-plussed. On and on it went, until I finally arrived back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing). What a relief!

Well, Kubuntu has turned out to be a bit of a disappointment. Power management is still intermittent, although not as critical as Gnome®-based Ubuntu. I have no idea where the problem lies. I surmise that the developers' attempt to shorten the boot time is probably causing the script or module loading failure. It's far more important that the operating system runs flawlessly rather than boot up faster. Inability to detect the battery or control the hard drive load cycle is unacceptable. Having to unplug the power supply or reboot the computer are both ridiculous solutions. Should I switch to yet another "distro"? Heck, I don't know anymore.

Litmus Test

I was piddling around with Kubuntu on my Acer® Aspire One netbook last night for a few hours. That's why the "blog" of yesterday was so abridged. So pathetic. Anyway, Kubuntu is starting to let me down. A start-up script didn't load and I was privy to experience the infamous hard drive load cycle problem. The hard drive heads were parking every five seconds. I knew that the script had failed because there was an error message stating that "kdesudo failed to execute without arguments." A simple reboot solved the problem. The battery is often not recognized, but I solved that problem yesterday. The little netbook is capable of running the extravagant compositor desktop effects. However, I disabled the latter to reduce the load on the graphics processor. Oh, what fun I had!

Another visit to Hawai'i Kai went well. Moms and I ate lunch at Zippy's. Later, moms served Welcome® vanilla ice cream for dessert. The rest of the day? The urban nomad fulfilled his usual benign functions and followed his routine itinerary as planned.

Incidentally, while moms and I were standing in the checkout line at Foodland, I felt a hand pat me on the back. Standing behind me was Joseph, the Iraqi guy. He's still working on the farm near the landlord's nursery. He said that he and his limerant object are quite happy in Kalihi. The rent is $500 per person and includes all utilities. I was actually glad to see the guy. What is it about the human animal that makes socializing somewhat pleasurable, even with people who were once considered irritating?

I spent about 45 minutes at Koko Head Park because I was not able to find shaded parking in Koko Marina. I had not been to the park in quite a while. Needless to say, I enjoyed myself. However, at one point, I felt extremely despondent. I imagined that inevitable day when I would no longer be around to engage in such a pleasurable activity. I also thought about my inability to attain true freedom. Well, I have already discussed those issues in the "blog." No need to belabor the point.

Back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing), I was overcome by grief. I kept looking at my collection of useless possessions. Why are they still around? I noticed a pile of tiny black bug carcasses numbering in the hundreds on the floor. The bugs come in every night, attracted to my squalid desk lamp. They land on the 60-watt light bulb and fry themselves silly. I'm glad that I was not born as one of those foolish insects. I opted for my last bottle of brewski in the fridge.

My squalid room is a prison. From the inside, I could hear Alan rummaging around in the kitchen. Apparently, he's back from who-knows-where, most likely Arizona. He couldn't afford a five-bedroom "McMansion" here in Hawai'i, so he purchased one in Arizona. Now, he must fly back and forth to enjoy his palatial manor. The young Asian hottie also made a brief stopover this evening. Yeah, so benign, it's truly sickening. Yet, halfway around the world, the Middle East and North Africa are now almost totally engulfed in protests by the enslaved masses. Are we looking at the flashpoint for the next world war? Deep down inside, I am hoping that the protests spread like a contagion around the world. It really is time for the failed "civilization" paradigm, the so-called "Western" one, to implode into a fiery inferno.

Well, the only revolution that I'll be privy to witness is when I install the next version of Kubuntu onto my Acer® Aspire One netbook computer. Everything is running fine with the current version, though. I already know the solutions to the minor quirks. Am I ready to ditch my Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer and my Seagate® FreeAgent Go® portable hard drive? Am I ready to bid farewell to my vast hurdy-gurdy video collection? That's the true litmus test for the exodus, isn't it?

Post No. 1,754

Same ol' shit. Same ol' shit. Same ol' shit. I wonder if I should just fill entire "blog" posts with the phrase, "Same ol' shit." What else could render the meaning of my whole life as useless? Anyway, absolutely nothing out of the ordinary transpired. Who knew, eh?

The Kubuntu installation on my Acer® Aspire One netbook is officially complete. Sadly, though, the next version of Kubuntu called, "Natty Narwhal," will be arriving in about two months. Included will be the latest version of KDE, which is quite tempting. Do I want to go through another tedious installation so soon? My only disappointment with Kubuntu is the outdated blue-colored theme (i.e., reminiscent of the old "XP" version of the "other" operating system). It's easy enough to change the wallpaper. However, then it won't match the KDM log-in theme. I suppose that I can get used to the blue-colored theme. Sheesh!

Babuino Desnudo Distracted

Last night at Slob Manor (read:rental housing), I did not sleep very well. For some reason, I was plagued by chronic insomnia. I heard the young Asian hottie come in at 12:30am. She had been around earlier at 4:30pm. I was surprised that she actually spent the night in her squalid room. This morning, I noticed that she brought a lot more stuff with her and left all of it lying around in the hallway and kitchen. Let's hope that she did not have a falling out with her BoyToy. The situation at Slob Manor could become mighty stupid if baby were around all the time.

The day? Same ol' shit. We all knew that already, though, didn't we? I was extremely fatigued due to sleep deprivation, which really didn't help my cause. There's really nothing worse than being both groggy and cranky. I felt like an old man, and rightly so. To boost my sagging morale, I stopped off at Subway® in the Aina Haina Shopping Center to procure a delicious meal. The salads that I have been preparing for myself every evening are bringing me to the point of starvation and malnutrition. Yet, I have no other alternative, what with proliferation of poisonous food. And, I certainly can't afford to eat at Subway® daily.

Strange thoughts have been popping up in the oversized cranium. I have been trying to come to grips with my mortality, a very difficult process. I'm beginning to equate the latter with Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and her treatise on the "Five Stages of Grief." I have also had bizarre reinterpretations of humanity. In my daily trek, I now envision myself and fellow humans as animals. I'm not "morphing" baboon-like features upon any of us. Rather, I am seeing humans as a distinct species of animal, moving about in animal-like fashion. Yes, it gets stranger. Fortunately, I am able to distract myself with computer nonsense so as not to get too serious and bring myself to the point of insanity. Nevertheless, I suffered several anxiety attacks of varying magnitude while I was at the gym. I'm not even sure if cheap booze could fully abate the symptoms. Sheesh!

Well, I have finally completed the tweaking of Kubuntu on my Acer® Aspire One netbook. What a cumbersome task! KDE is far more complicated than Gnome®. However, nothing stops a true computer nerd. PowerDevil almost let me down when it could not sense the battery. The LCD screen brightness control still functioned. I simply unplugged the power cord to the computer, and PowerDevil immediately recognized the battery. Everything was back to normal. Soon, I won't have any more distractions.

From Ubuntu to Kubuntu

Last night, I took a long hard look at the Kubuntu version of "Maverick Meerkat," and I was simply astonished. Everything worked fine, including the power management utility (i.e., PowerDevil). The "plasma" netbook desktop was nice to look at, but it was a nightmare to navigate. So, I moved on to the normal KDE desktop. Did I foolishly install it over Ubuntu? Yes, I did. The installation was flawless and much quicker than Ubuntu. Overall, I feel stupid because I didn't switch earlier.

I have no idea why power management works fine in Kubuntu, but is intermittent in its parent. I first thought that there might be a problem with the ACPI daemon. However, the issue seems to be isolated to Gnome®. I know that scripts often fail to run during the Ubuntu start-up. Why is Kubuntu different?

The day? Same ol' shit. All I could think about was my strategy to complete the deployment of Kubuntu. Thus, I could hardly wait to get back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing). After another two hours of time, I had installed and uninstalled numerous applications, tweaked various preferences, and performed some minor optimizations of Kubuntu. It's running fine on my Acer® Aspire One netbook as we speak. Heck, I'm even using the KDE Reconq Web browser. Yes, I'm a KDE convert.

Once again, the computer nerd fun has kept me distracted from the more urgent and somber aspects of my paltry existence. I am relieved to have distractions because I am not sure if my sanity could remain intact otherwise. Needless to say, the same issues will keep coming back like a bad sitcom.

My last comment for the day is about my ride on the Route 1L bus this afternoon. Along the way, a seemingly homeless guy boarded the bus. He was completely filthy and smelled really bad. The bus driver followed him all the way to the back of the bus, noisily opening all of the roof vents. Many of the passengers were giggling over the spectacle. The homeless guy said nothing. He sat way in the back, just a few feet away from me. He had very little in the way of possessions, unlike some of the other homeless who ride the ride the bus. He wasn't obnoxious either. All the passengers moved away from him, leaving a conspicuous ring of empty seats around him in an otherwise crowded bus. The treatment that the poor homeless guy received was cruel, given that he did not bother anyone. That's "civilization" for you.

Marginal Peace of Mind

Last night, I attempted to change the Plymouth splash screen on Ubuntu "Maverick Meerkat" using tried-and-true command line methods. Upon restart, my Acer® Aspire One netbook would not go past the splash screen. Plymouth apparently froze. Fortunately, I didn't panic. I was able to reboot the computer in "safe mode" and uninstall the replacement splash theme. For a while, I thought that I would have to install the entire operating system again. Oh, the horrors of technology!

Another visit to Hawai'i Kai went well. Moms and I ate lunch at Panda Express®. Later, moms served Foremost® vanilla ice cream for dessert. The rest of the day? The urban nomad fulfilled his usual benign functions and followed his routine itinerary as planned.

My Monday workouts have been leisurely at best. Actually, every Monday was initially supposed to be my day off from the gym, but I essentially go there to take a shower. I usually do a brief cardio workout, rarely breaking a sweat. I may also do a quick bicep/tricep weight set as an option. Nothing too strenuous. And, what exactly would I do if I didn't go to the gym?

During the day, I seriously contemplated switching from Ubuntu to Kubuntu which uses KDE. The problem, of course, is that KDE is heavily Qt-based, Qt being currently owned by Nokia®. The hullabaloo all started with the alleged fall of MeeGo®, which was precipitated by the departure of Nokia® from the partnership with Intel®. Nokia® is now in partnership with Microsoft®, so it is no longer dependent on the MeeGo® Phone UX (also based on Qt). Thus, Nokia® no longer needs Qt. The fate of Nokia® determines the fate of Qt, which will ultimately affect KDE and MeeGo®. All that to say, no Kubuntu for now. However, I may run Kubuntu "live" just to see what it's like.

Back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing), nothing new to report. No one has been in the house for days. Only the young Asian hottie came by briefly this evening. Obviously, I did not exit my squalid room during that time. So, I have enjoyed a few days in complete isolation. I was actually able to experience peace of mind, albeit marginally. Sheesh!

Day 44

Another urban nomad kind-of-a-Sunday ... nada. Only a microsecond glimpse of the hottie gym trainer at the gym. Boohoo. The highlight of the day was when I washed my Nissan® Frontier truck this afternoon when I returned to Slob Manor (read: rental housing) from my foray into the wild of "civilization." The best part is that I no longer need to wax the truck as a separate operation. Oh, the wonders of technology!

Typical Technology Hottie

My experience with Ubuntu "Maverick Meerkat" has been degenerating with each passing day. For the most part, Ubuntu works. However, the small annoying problems can drive anyone berserk. For example, the power management utility cannot seem to recognize the battery most of the time. Why, pray tell? The Plymouth boot splash utility is intermittent, too. Why does Plymouth work on MeeGo®? Oh, the horrors of technology! Little wonder why Linux will not be presenting any kind of threat to the two commercial operating systems with the largest market shares.

Frankly, I am ready to dump both the Toshiba® Satellite notebook and the Acer® Aspire One netbook computers in the trash can. If it weren't for my vast hurdy-gurdy video collection , I would have done so long ago. I'd like to replace both with a nice stand-alone tablet computer. When I say, "stand-alone," I mean that a device does not need another computer to upgrade or install anything. Such a device will not arrive on the scene for years to come, I'm afraid.

Well, I have had enough computer fun to last a lifetime. Obviously, with so little time left, I need to mummify the situation. I must get back to the task of preparing for the exodus, whatever that entails. After all, this is Day 44 of the new year.

Doldrums Redux

Same ol' shit. At the library, I completed reading the book, "War: The Lethal Custom," by Gwynne Dyer. Excellent book, I might add. The rest of the day? Did I already mention, "Same ol' shit"?

Well, I am still wasting more precious time with the pruning of Ubuntu "Maverick Meerkat." Frankly, it's really a useless task. The next version of Ubuntu is due in less than three months anyway. Sadly, I have discovered that there are a few annoying problems, the most important of which is the intermittent LCD screen brightness control. Other problems include no detection of the internal microphone or the multi-format memory card reader, no detection of the battery, and poor video playback performance. So, I will be diligently searching for solutions on the Net.

At the very least, my latest computer nerd project has driven me out of the doldrums. I was essentially shutting down. Nothing was getting done. I didn't even feel like eating food. Of course, most of the available food is poisonous anyway. Well, I'm not back to "100 percent" yet. I probably never will be. However, any improvement is welcome.

Maverick Meerkat Mania

Another visit to Hawai'i Kai went well. Moms served Keoki's® Pork Lau Lau, fresh ahi sashimi, fresh vegetables, and rice for lunch. Later, moms served Welcome® vanilla ice cream for dessert. The rest of the day? The urban nomad fulfilled his usual benign functions and followed his routine itinerary as planned.

I was slightly groggy for most of the day because the idiot who reside in the attached studio at Slob Manor (read: rental housing), was sitting outside with his buddy at 4am this morning. I'm not certain if they were intoxicated or not, although there's no other reason to be sitting outside at 4am and talking at the top of their lungs. The clown seems to be running some kind of motel because there are strange people staying over all the time, all of them being guys (except for that one rare evening with the giggling babe).

Well, I have certainly been wasting a lot of time on the installation of Ubuntu "Maverick Meerkat" on my Acer® Aspire One netbook. Hours were devoted to remove unnecessary software, although there will be no improvement in performance. The recovered hard drive space will also be negligible. So, why bother? I don't really have an answer. There was a slight reduction in the number of updates, though.

I decided to go with regular Ubuntu using the Gnome® desktop because I discovered that Gnome® components are used in every other desktop except KDE. I could have chosen Kubuntu with KDE, but the latter desktop is truly bloated. And, I prefer the simplicity of Gnome®. Unfortunately, a few applications (e.g., Evolution e-mail client) are tightly integrated with Gnome®. There is no way to completely remove all traces of Evolution. I am, however, satisfied that most of the bloated e-mail client is gone.

I'll be wasting more precious time tonight doing who-knows-what with my Acer® Aspire One netbook. As far as I know, it is ready to replace my aging Toshiba® Satellite notebook computer on a temporary basis. So, there won't be any down time for the "blog." Baha! Ha! Ha! Haaa! Who really cares if the "blog" goes down or not?

Meego® Out, Ubuntu In

Last night, I spent all evening attempting to install some kind of working Linux-based operating system (OS) on my Acer® Aspire One netbook computer. I attempted to use the text-based installer for Lubuntu since the graphical installer failed. No dice. I finally installed regular Ubuntu (v10.10 aka "Maverick Meerkat") with the Gnome® desktop. By the way, for both "flavors," there was an initial installation problem because of an error in the Syslinux boot configuration file.

Anyway, the installation went fine after I edited the configuration file. I was amazed at how well Ubuntu "Maverick Meerkat" performed. It was fully functional even with the Compiz compositor running. However, I temporarily disabled it to increase responsiveness. Power management seemed to be operational. And, the hard drive load cycle problem seems to have been cured. What a difference from "Lucid Lynx"!

I did not sleep well last night because I was planning my strategy to optimize my Acer® Aspire One netbook. Foolish, I know. As for the day, nothing new to report. Same ol' shit. I was anxious to return to Slob Manor (read: rental housing) in order to complete the optimization of the netbook.

I have to admit that the Ubuntu installation was the slowest that I have ever experienced. It took well over an hour, and that's still with 256 updates in the queue. I spent most of the evening uninstalling all of the useless applications (e.g., bloated office suite, social networking crap) and installing lightweight applications more suitable to my monk life-style.

HP® WebOS® TouchPad

Well, I am pretty certain that nerd rumor mill was correct in predicting the demise of MeeGo®. It's too little, too late for markets that are saturating quickly. For example, take a gander at the new HP® TouchPad tablet that is coming out in the middle of the year. Netbooks are on the way out. However, I am committed to making the Acer® Aspire One a true replacement for a larger notebook computer. Sheesh!

Lessons of Life

I have not been able to pinpoint the source of my psychological discomfort, although I am still experiencing frequent bouts of sadness and anxiety. My patience has also been at an all-time low. I've also been very tempted to destroy all of my useless possessions with my bare hands. I want to violently tear them apart. I don't know what has come over me, but it feels irreversible. The "inner animal," you think?

I suppose that I am now at a logical point given my path through nihilism, agnosticism, and atheism, all in the time frame of two years no less. I have recorded most of the journey in the "blog." However, I have left out much of the overall anguish. I just couldn't bring myself to delineate upon my misery. Ultimately, the philosophical journey converged with real life. I became acutely aware of human mortality. I have also soberly concluded that we are alone in the universe. Whether we are here by benign creation or evolution, the end result is the same. We know nothing about our origins and the distant past. We have no other entity to rely upon except ourselves. And, there are few absolute truths (refer to the "blog" of July 28th of last year).

I could say that I am in shock, the natural result of discovering that my only moment on the long timeline of the universe is extremely short and nearing its end. Resurrection and reincarnation are the stuff of infantile fantasies. The essence our being, our cognition, is all stored in our brain. Once the brain goes, we're gone without a trace. There is no immortal soul, or a soul that can be restored. My theoretical concept of the "soul" as a "lifeforce" is erroneous. Our consciousness is mortal as well.

The universe is morally neutral. Yet, on earth, humans have attempted to define morality. For example, "civilization" has fine laws to criminalize murder and mayhem. Yet, in sanctioned and contained violence (e.g., war), murder and mayhem are exalted and often sanctified. What are we to make of such blatant hypocrisy?

Typical "Grand Purpose" Hottie

We humans simply do not have a grand purpose whatsoever. We are simply animals with the ability to think a little deeper. Yet, purpose always remains elusive. Frankly, our purpose appears to be bent on destruction. We cannot engage in acts of pure creation. In other words, we cannot create something from nothing (except fiat money). For everything that we create, something else must be destroyed in the process. What is wrong with humanity?

As for the day, can you say, "Same ol' shit"? Incidentally, the nerd rumor mill is predicting the demise of MeeGo® commencing with the Netbook UX. I am not going to wait for the "official" announcement. In fact, there may not be an announcement at all. So, in my fragile mental state, I must now look for another operating system for my Acer® Aspire One. Back to Ubuntu (or one of its derivatives)? Say it ain't so!

Brain Donors

Last night, I enjoyed another evening alone in Slob Manor (read: rental housing). I remained locked in my squalid room until morning. I heard the young hottie Asian babe coming and going. She spent all of 20 minutes in her squalid room. Then, off she went, presumably to the boyfriend's abode. And, with Alan gone to parts unknown, I was assured of not being awakened in the wee hours of the morning with him banging around in the kitchen. I was experiencing a truly unique moment at Slob Manor.

Well, I had spoken too soon. I was rudely awakened by an extremely loud conversation at approximately 3am this morning. A young ho' at the Chinaman house next door had an early morning visit from her BoyToy. The conversation went on for over 30 minutes, surprisingly not in Chinkspeak. Then, the moronic BoyToy drove off in his piece of shit (i.e., "riceboy") with its hollowed-out muffler. The stupid "slope" needs to get a real automobile. If Chinese president Hu Jintao were here, heads would definitely be rolling.

An urban nomad kind-of-a-day? Is there any other kind-of-a-day? Same ol' shit? Yeah, same ol' shit. No details are necessary. I did happen to spot the newly-homeless guy at the library. He spent all of his time piddling around with his Apple® iPhone 4G. He was wearing the same clothes that he wore on Saturday. Nothing wrong with that, I suppose. Heck, I wear the same clothes for exactly a week before changing them. The newly-homeless guy eventually departed, most likely to Chinatown.

Back at Slob Manor, the quiet ambiance this evening was disturbed by the young Asian hottie tenant. Upon arrival at 6:30pm, she kept fiddling with the washing machine for the longest time. All the while, the door to her squalid room kept slamming every five seconds because of the wind. So, why keep opening the door again? I don't think that she figured out how to use the washing machine. Nor could she understand that the door to her squalid room would keep slamming without using a doorstop. The chick may be a hottie, but she's "dumber than a knob." Fortunately, baby finally departed at 8pm. Ah, peace and quiet again.

Incidentally, I read an interesting article on the [deleted] site titled, "One in seven Americans on food stamps." There are 43.6 million of the empire's citizens on the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) or "food stamps." There are many more who qualify but have chosen not to participate for a variety of reasons. The most important fact is that, to qualify for the program, a candidate cannot have more $2,000 in assets. In other words, there are over 44 million people with $2,000 or less to their names. Can you imagine a personal net worth of just $2,000? What is one to make of such a tragedy?

Post No. 1,744

Last night, I spent another evening in relative peace and quiet at Slob Manor (read: rental housing), that is, if I discount the horrendous noise of the endless traffic on Kalani'ana'ole Highway. Otherwise, no sign of the other housemates since Friday, thank goodness. The landlord is probably extremely elated since the house is fully rented out, maximum rent is being collected, and the utility bills are dropping down to a minimum because no one is around much. A landlord's paradise, eh?

I continue to follow lockdown procedures once I am back in my squalid room. I rarely leave my self-made prison, for there is nothing outside for me. I am biding my time, downloading more and more hurdy-gurdy videos for my massive collection. Why hurdy-gurdy videos instead of skinnin' up real chicks? From all appearances, I seem to be exercising pure "free will." Therefore, I am voluntarily choosing a more painful path over a more comforting one, which is a usurpation of the natural order. Or, am I?

Upon closer scrutiny, a casual observer would note that my net worth keeps shrinking. As I submerge deeper into poverty, my choices will rapidly disappear. Eventually, I may only be left with one choice, the most painful path. Only foolish optimists would unleash their imagination to hallucinate non-existent options. In addition, I am a misanthrope and social misfit. I wasn't born that way. After decades of having to "bend over and drop the soap" in the empire's perverted "system," I became extremely cynical. I could trust no one. Friendships were hollow and lacked integrity. Even family was suspect. Thus, I had to expedite my exit from society. There was no choice. Stay in, remain a slave, be abused. Get out, find freedom, start anew.

Another visit to Hawai'i Kai went well. Moms and I ate lunch at Panda Express®. My Panda Express® fortune cookie's prediction: "The near future holds a gift of contentment." Fat chance! Later, moms served Welcome® vanilla ice cream for dessert. The rest of the day? The urban nomad fulfilled his usual benign functions and followed his routine itinerary as planned. By the way, moms is turning 89 years of age tomorrow.

I was in what seemed to be a catatonic state all day. I felt fatigued, and also sad. I cannot explain the sadness. And, I certainly did not feel as though I had any semblance of "free will." I was even approached by two people who were interested in purchasing my Nissan® Frontier truck. I was so "out of it" that I couldn't really even answer the simplest questions. I definitely forgot about the "For Sale" sign that is still displayed in the rear window of the truck. What a maroon!

When I returned to Slob Manor late this afternoon, I observed the landlord and the pest control guy outside. The pest control guy was spraying insecticide around the house. Even the landlord knows that the ant situation is out of control. I was able to secure a couple of "professional" ant traps from the pest control guy for use in my squalid room. The latter should prove far more effective than squishing each sugar ant's tiny head with a filthy rag. Sheesh!

"Free Will" Foolery

Last night, I was the sole person in the whole of Slob Manor (read: rental housing), excluding the attached studio and the landlord's place in the back. I had no idea where anybody was, and neither did I care. Peace and quiet, that's my only concern. The Chinaman house next door was also suspiciously silent. The raucous party did not end until sunrise, so the brain donors were probably still sleeping. Where is Chinese president Hu Jintao when we urgently need him?

Another urban nomad kind-of-a-Sunday was highlighted by short glimpse of the hottie gym trainer. Unfortunately, the day was marred by an asshole. Not a sphincter per se, but an older haole clown who walked right in front of me, even bumping into me, while I stood in line to board the bus after my workout at the gym. The moron said nothing and walked on. I politely called him a variety of names laced with expletives to wake him up from his stupor. He turned around just as I boarded the bus. The local guy who was standing behind me was the recipient of some sassy backtalk from the fool. Had I heard any of that crap, I would have bumrushed the loser. Even the local guy was amazed at the brazen rudeness of the asswipe. He thought the shithead was a tourist. I knew otherwise, since I had just seen the fucktard at the gym. The faggot was working out with five-pound weights. He must have felt "pumped up." Yeah, the asshole and I may be on a collision course with fate, if I can help it.

The elder gym faggot was probably trying to exercise "free will" by pushing his way through a line of people rather than walking to the side. However, "free will" could easily be usurped by a massive head concussion or by severe abrasions and contusions about the face and scalp. Do we humans really have "free will"? According to Arthur Blech, author of "Toward a New Civilization," the answer is a resounding negative. I can understand Blech's point. After all, we cannot exercise "free will" over our biological functions. We must eat and sleep, for example. Blech also asserted that humans will not consciously choose a more painful path over a less painful one, essentially an axiom of the natural order. "Free will" would allow us to choose either option without prejudice. Thus, if we do possess "free will," it is limited in scope.

The belief in "free will" has led humans down the road of schizophrenic delusion, self-aggrandizement, and sheer arrogance. Idiotic religions were concocted, foolish philosophies were developed, questionable moral and ethical standards were codified, and "dominion" over other creatures with allegedly no capacity for "free will" was established. What really can be said about the tragic comedy of humanity?

Chinatown

I was rudely awakened at 4am this morning by another raucous party at the Chinaman house next door to Slob Manor (read: rental housing). I'm actually not even sure how I had slept until then since the party had been going on from the early evening. The loudest fool, of course, was the same Chinaman who was drunk and singing at the top his lungs in Chinkspeak just a few parties ago. What would Chinese president Hu Jintau think about those shiftless losers?

Typical Chinatown Hottie

At the library, I sat in the inner courtyard as usual. A newly-homeless guy was sitting at a table just a few feet away. The homeless guy was talking on his cell phone to his mother. Judging from his accent, he is probably from the South on the mainland. He lamented that he only had $3.61 in his pocket, and he couldn't even purchase a pack of cigarettes. All he had to his name was his small, tattered backpack, the clothes on his back, whatever is in a storage locker at an undisclosed location, and his Apple® iPhone 4G. Everything else was in a recently stolen backpack. I noticed that his feet were swollen, possibly diseased, a common affliction amongst the homeless. "I'm losing my motivation," he said. "I don't think I'm going to last a year like this." I was not sensing that his mother was willing to assist him beyond a few platitudes. "My problem is spiritual, not psychological," he added. The conversation went on for a while. He was apparently heading to Chinatown shortly afterward because "that is the only place the police don't hassle the homeless." Before ending the conversation, he said that he was going outside to "bum off a cigarette."

When I walked outside a few minutes later to eat my lunch in the coconut tree grove in the Capitol district, I observed the same homeless guy sitting with a few other guys in the unofficial smoking area. Apparently, he found a benevolent soul to donate a cigarette to him. As I settled under a coconut tree, I saw the homeless guy walking off toward Chinatown. The rest of the day? Same ol' shit.

Net Worth(less)

I was rudely awakened by Alan at 2am this morning. He noisily made something to eat, all the while slamming things around in the kitchen. He was also coughing and hacking nearly non-stop. He believes that he is suffering from an allergic reaction to vog. However, there is no vog. The sky has been clear for at least a couple of months. Alan is probably suffering from a chronic respiratory illness. He runs a little side business in which he produces marble plaques with gold-leafed detailing. He utilizes a variety of toxic chemicals, oftentimes doing the work in his squalid room with all of the windows closed. I surmise that vog is the least of his worries.

Another visit to Hawai'i Kai went well. Moms and I ate lunch at Zippy's. Later, moms served Foremost® vanilla ice cream for dessert. The rest of the day? The urban nomad fulfilled his usual benign functions and followed his routine itinerary as planned.

Moms mentioned that my sister-in-law has already submitted her resignation to the law firm that she's employed with, effective at the end of the month. She has not secured another position elsewhere. And, the caretaker option has not panned out. Can my bro's family survive on one income? Is that why my bro appears to always be stressed out?

When I arrived back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing), I noticed that the new upstairs tenant was finally moving stuff in. I helped him move his new widescreen LCD tube upstairs. For that, he rewarded me with a brewski. I was pleased. Turns out, he's renting the entire second floor. The guy appears to have a lot of money. He's a local boy and seems to be personable. The landlord had mentioned that he is not a wage slave. Will he share the secrets of his wealth? As for the young Asian hottie tenant, she has only been around a total of three minutes since I first saw her. The situation at Slob Manor could be finally be tolerable.

Here is an interesting excerpted quote from Thomas Stanley, author of the book, "The Millionaire Next Door":

The average net worth of an American household is $434,782. However, there is a major problem with this wealth figure. When it comes to expressing the net worth/wealth of a household the average figure is very misleading.

The median measure of household net worth paints a much more accurate picture of the character of wealth in America than does the average. Today the median net worth of an American household is $91,304.

Most American households are nowhere near being financially independent. Nor will most be able to retire in comfort. Yet there is more bad news. What if the equity in homes and motor vehicles is factored out of the median net worth figure? Then the median figure is about $34,000 or about 2/3 of the annual median income generated by a typical American household today.

The median figure is much more realistic because it is not skewed higher by mega-income families (i.e., the ruling class).

Well, I have yet to complete my own annual net worth summary (not available). I only have a couple more figures to enter in the basic spreadsheet. However, in my fragile mental state, simple tasks have become a nightmare. Sheesh! The final product could be uploaded as early as this evening, though.

Dreams of World Peace

This morning, as I sat on a concrete bench at the Ala Moana Center mauka bus stop with a cup of coffee in hand, I observed a crazed ho' walking around and talking aloud. The ho', who was probably close to my age, was wearing a skimpy outfit more suitable for a young hottie. An extremely large gut was protruding from the exposed midriff. As to be expected, the ho' stopped to chat with me. The ho' told me that she was reading the Bible (i.e., Unholy Scriptures), and also informed me that there were perverts lurking in restroom stalls in the mall. I just kept nodding my head, saying nothing. Just another day in the life of the urban nomad. Other details of the day are redundant and moot.

I have been observing hella people carrying around copies of the Unholy Scriptures. The observation is always the same. The Unholy Scriptures is opened to a particular page somewhere around the middle of the voluminous work. A passage is read. Then, countless pages are shuffled. A look of astonishment engulfs the reader's face. Surely, none of them has ever read the entire work. It's too daunting. The print is too small. And, let's face it, the content is boring (and entirely fabricated). Yet, they are believers. That's why they carry the Unholy Scriptures with them. They carry the message of peace, or so they believe.

Can there really be peace in the entire world? When I say, "peace," I can only be alluding to a state as perceived by humans alone. In my younger days, I was inclined to be pacifistic and Utopian. Perhaps that is why I was almost hoodwinked by religious mumbo-jumbo. In my quasi-enlightened state, I can safely say that world peace will never come to fruition. If it theoretically happened, then humanity would accelerate very quickly to its demise through natural attrition. Obviously, natural attrition is accompanied by intense pain and suffering. Peace would quickly give way to violent discord anyway.

The concept of peace is part and parcel to the failed "civilization" paradigm. "Civilization" was supposed to tame the savage beasts. It was supposed to bring an end to senseless human violence and convert that useless energy to more constructive purposes. Yet, "civilization," or "Western civilization," is heavily based upon the extremely flawed philosophy of the Yahweh Triad (i.e., Judaism, Pauline-Christianity, and Islam). Yes, believe it or not, Islam is a "Western" religion. Historically, the Middle East is really a part of the "West," just like Europe. Heck, the Roman Empire once subsumed the region. The "East" is India, China, and beyond.

The "inner animal" itself is not peaceful. The innate "aggression" (as pundits call it) and the propensity for violence is part of the survival mechanism of humans. I am not speaking of Darwinian evolution or Social Darwinism. The "inner animal" is prepared to commit mass genocide whenever human population outstrips available resources. Humans become their own predators by necessity to stave off the horrifying effects of natural attrition. Thus, world peace is an entirely elusive dream.

Mayhem or Attrition?

My Nissan® Frontier truck and I were on our way to Hawai'i Kai at 7:50am this morning. On Monday, moms had mentioned that she and my sister-in-law were going to attend the neighbor's funeral on Friday. I was concerned that moms may not have realized that there could be a conflict with my usual visit. Turns out, the funeral is scheduled for Friday evening.

At 9am, I drove my truck to Koko Marina and found shaded parking. I rode the bus town and performed the urban nomad ritual. The highlight of the day was the restoration of my extreme monk haircut at the Institute of Hair Design. After my usual workout at the gym, I was on my way back to Koko Marina. A quick jaunt through Foodland, and then I was magically transported back to Slob Manor (read: rental housing). Really? No, not really.

I have become more and more "disconnected" from society-at-large. Each day poses new problems for me, as I have become obstinate about cooperating with any framework associated with the so-called "mainstream." Checking my mail box, voicemail, and e-mail have become tedious tasks. Paying bills and the mortgage on the detestable "condotel" unit is at a painful peak. I look forward to the day that that I can "wash my hands" of everything and say, "That's it, I'm through."

I have been trying to put myself into a meditative frame of mind with little success. I have been too preoccupied with the dreadful concept of mortality and other intriguing mysteries of the universe. I have also been trying to deconstruct "civilization" to probe the essence of human existence.

Well, so far, the results have been disturbing. Humans are just another species of animal. We followed the natural order (i.e., Nature) until the advent of the failed "civilization" paradigm. Once we moved from "savages" (i.e., "howling barbarians") to "civilized" humans, our numbers increased dramatically. The "inner animal" methodology to prune overpopulation was replaced by supposedly contained institutions of violence (e.g., wars, mass genocide). Unfortunately, increased technology has resulted in weaponry that can cause near mass extinction of all species of life on the planet. The ruling class is afraid to deploy such weaponry because there is a good chance that they may inadvertently destroy themselves as well. It is not out of the goodness of their hearts that we have not seen any large-scale nuclear conflagrations.

The failed "civilization" paradigm will continue to run its course. We have already exceeded the carrying capacity of the planet. Our survival is dependent on artificial means in order to defy the natural order. Sooner or later, we won't be able to "squeeze blood out of a turnip" anymore. We will run out of food and clean water. Natural attrition will take over to accomplish what we could not do.

Would we have been better off if we remained "savages"? Obviously, our "quality of life" would be significantly lower. We would function more like the other animals. There would be little time for introspection and the development of "self." We would live shorter, healthier lives as opposed to longer, unhealthy ones. There would still be wars, feuds, genocide, maiming, and killing, only on a smaller scale. Yes, the "inner animal" will remain intact below the surface no matter what, waiting for the opportune moment to rise to the occasion.

Disrupting the Natural Order

This morning, as I walked to the bus stop located across from Kawaikui Beach Park, I noticed a bird lying on the sidewalk. A clump of dung was sitting right next to it. The bird was clearly deceased. Since the carcass was intact, I assumed that it was not the victim of a predator. I looked up and noticed that there were tree branches right above. The bird probably keeled over from natural causes while perched in the tree.

I have learned a lot from birds (since there is a conspicuous absence of other wild creatures). I am privy to have hundreds of them keep me company during my lunch in the coconut tree grove in the Capitol district. Of course, the lack of predators (i.e., wild animals) means that there is an overpopulation of birds in the islands. Nonetheless, I spend most of my lunch time observing the birds.

Typical "Free Will" Hottie

Even with their little pea-sized brains, our feathered friends display distinct personalities and some degree of free will. An example of the latter is when I see myna birds running for an extremely long distance as opposed to simply flying to their destination. The birds have clearly made a decision, which means they are not acting on instinct alone.

One day a while back at a bus stop on Waialae Avenue, I observed a group of pigeons feasting on a scraps of pizza that someone had left. Out of the seven birds, there was only one dominant personality amongst them. The "bully" pigeon kept waddling to each and every scrap and pecked at the heads of the other birds in order to chase them off. The other birds displayed subservient behavior and did not fight back. The "bully" pigeon, however, spent more time chasing off the other birds (they kept coming back) than eating. Obviously, there is meaning to the phrase, "pecking order."

Humans love to revel in self-"exceptionalism." Such foolish thinking is what led to faulty paradigms as "dominion." Unfortunately, non-human creatures possess some very similar traits to humans. There clearly isn't as large a rift between humans and other creatures as we'd like to imagine.

As I mentioned previously, birds are severely overpopulated in Hawai'i. The balance of the natural order (i.e., Nature) has been disrupted by human infiltration. No creature on the planet appears to have a self-regulating mechanism for population control. Only an intact food chain insures that balance is preserved. The same can be said of humans. However, there are no animal predators stalking humans in sufficient numbers to keep human population growth in check.

Only humans can control their population. However, the urge to do da wild thing is so strong that control becomes moot. The "inner animal," which has been forcefully suppressed by the "civilization" paradigm, holds the key. Human violence, perpetrated against other humans through "cleansing" pogroms (e.g., wars, mass genocide), is the only effective mechanism for human population control next to attrition and natural disasters. Human history and prehistory is marked by endless violence and genocide. The latter is no anomaly. It is human nature, the natural order. The failed "civilization" paradigm offered up a moral dimension to what is a natural human control mechanism for overpopulation. By declaring human life to be "sacred," the natural order was disturbed. Surely, humans could curb their population voluntarily and peacefully? No, there's no way to muzzle the Vienna Sausage. Baha! Ha! Ha! Haaa!

Back at Slob Manor (read: rental housing), the new tenants have both moved in. The chick tenant is a young Asian hottie. When I say "young," I mean early twenties. When I say, "hottie," I mean a real hottie. She could easily be a centerfold babe. I don't expect her to last more than a month or so. How can a young hottie reside in the same dump with three unattractive slobs in their late fifties? We must look like "dirty old men" to her. It's an obvious tectonic fault line in the natural order. If I was her boyfriend, I would be significantly spooked to move her out of the perverted Slob Manor as fast as possible. Let's hope that he comes to his senses real soon.